So glad I found you guys!

[hdugger]

Hdugger, after rational thinking I still think I need rescuing. Why on earth did they build all those hospitals at a top of a hill anyway?

We appear to have a fair number of Chinchillas at the Oregon Humane society (along with two degus and a rat named Pookie ) I'm a bit (!?!) of a critter fanatic, so I'd be happy to take you on a trip over there. And, if you're not full up on beauty from living in BC, we could even take a look at Multnomah Falls, which is just a little ways past the animal shelter.

We all think that about OHSU, especially when there's ice on the roads. I've never seen a hospital in a more precarious or hard to reach place.

[leahdragonfly]

Hi Elisa,

my heart is breaking for you, as the closeness of what's to come is setting in. I wish I were not 2 hours away from Portland. But all your forum friends will be with you, and certainly the week after each of the surgeries will go by quickly.

When we were in Shriners St Louis I know they had therapy dogs that visited. We were there just a few days and so did not see them, but maybe you will be lucky. I totally understand how difficult and lonely it is to be away from pets and home. Will your husband be able to come down and visit at all during the 5 weeks? Do you have any family who can come for even a short visit?

Please know that we are all thinking of you and Elias as his surgery date nears.

Fondly,

Gayle

[Pooka1]

That's a good idea if your husband or older daughter or someone can come visit.

In the meantime, I will post important chin puff updates like the following...

http://cuteoverload.com/2005/12/13/meanwhile_on_th/

http://cuteoverload.com/2007/07/10/iron-chinchilla/

http://cuteoverload.com/2009/12/29/%...%AA-%E2%99%AB/

http://cuteoverload.com/2010/08/06/w...hinchy-burger/


And to completely hyp-mo-tize you...

http://cuteoverload.com/2009/07/26/non-existent-ears/

[Elisa]

Very cute Pooka. I will definitely miss my chin puffs but I'm not going to miss all the mess they make and will enjoy a bit of a break from the seven dwarfs, lol.

Gayle, my sister and BIL will be heading down to Portland for Elias' first surgery which is scheduled for March 22nd. and will stay for a few days she says. Other than that no one will be there except me as I have a very small family: mom, who isn't the best driver, although she gets furious when people tell her that, dad, who has Alzheimer's and is in the hospital right now, brother, who lives in Calgary and his wife is in the hospital right now and that's it. No aunts, uncles or cousins as they all live in Scotland. My husband needs to stay here to care for the house/animals and my daughter is in grade twelve and it's her graduating year so she needs to stay and finish up.

I'll be fine. I just had a big feel sorry day for myself yesterday b/c there is a part of me that doesn't want to go through with this and be away for so long but Elias needs this. I'm also furious with BC Medical for not seeing Elias when his scoliosis wasn't near as bad as it is now and for forcing us to look elsewhere for help. His spine is definitely a "train wreck" now but it wasn't six months ago or less.

Hdugger, I'd love to see the falls!

[jrnyc]

well, any time you get to feeling down or lonely while you are there, just remind yourself this is for Elias' future....a future that can now be healthy and strong!

i guess i am used to being alone...doesn't bother me...didn't get married til 4 years ago...sometimes i miss the freedom of alone time!

when you are not at the hospital, you can do whatever you want! try to think of it as a break from all responsibilities besides your son!
and i thought you might like a gym just to hang upside down!

jess

[Elisa]

Jess, I don't need to go to a gym to hang upside down, I'm planning on bringing that exercise bar with me and will install it in a doorway on the ward... wheeeeeee!

I am not used to being alone. Lived with my sister when I moved out of mom and dad's place then met Gordon soon after and got engaged when I was 19 and then the kiddos came along. I love being by myself at times but it's here in my own home, not in a strange city, living at a hospital. I don't sleep all that well a lot of nights as it is so trying to sleep in a strange place with nurses coming and going is just going to be weird.

You're right about focusing on Elias' future though and for him I will do this b/c he's my bebe and I want the best for him as any mother would.

I wonder how long his first surgery and halo application will be and whether he'll be able sit up and read or play around on his laptop or whether he'll have to lie flat on his back in that circle bed and if so for how long? They don't give you all the details at once b/c they don't want to overwhelm you, or at least that's my theory.

Edit: I always find ways to hurt myself it seems. Earlier on I was shoving some cutlery into the dishwasher basket and there was a fork with the prongs up and I jammed my right thumb into the prong and it went underneath my nail a good third of the way. It is throbbing!

[jrnyc]

i wonder if you are worried and distracted about the upcoming surgeries...when anyone is like that, subconsciously distracted, it is VERY easy to get hurt...or have any kind of accident, or lose things (my MO when like that is to lose wallets, keys, etc)

i hope you can find a way to get some rest...REAL rest...before you leave for the hospital in the States...worry alone will exhaust you, never mind starting out from a place of exhaustion!

please take care of yourself!!
is there anything you can do to make yourself more tired to be able to sleep...?
sometimes when i read my eyes get tired and i fall asleep...i don't sleep well, and the older i get the worse it gets...and the more i turn to ambien!

jess

[Elisa]

Hey Jess, well I'm definitely distracted that's for sure so that could be why I'm hurting myself lately. Also burned my arm taking a pizza out of the oven, grrrr.

I'm just a really light sleeper. I have no trouble falling asleep it's staying asleep that's difficult and once I'm awake I can lie there for hours tossing and turning and then when I finally get to sleep I have to get up. Very frustrating and I'm tired a lot.

I do have Ativan than I can take when I can't fall back asleep and that seems to help. I don't take a full mg, just break it into pieces and my GP is okay with that. I asked him about something else for sleep but he said to stick with what I'm doing so that's what I'm going to do.

Between trouble sleeping and anxiety over the whole surgeries/traction and living in the hospital for weeks, I've got a feeling I'll be popping those pills like Pez. I'm going to have to go through withdrawals when I get back I think.

Still so grumpy, irritable and agitated today for some reason and I can't seem to kick the mood so I'm off to work for a while and hopefully the change of scenery will make me in a better mood. What I really want is Eggs Benny but that's not going to happen so I'll have to settle for some toast, boo.

[Elisa]

Just got off the phone with Marina (Shriners in Burnaby BC) and she has given me the details of our next trip down to Portland. Will be picked up on Saturday morning March 19th. then catch a ferry to Vancouver, stay at the Accent Inn in Burnaby and then get on the big bus the next morning to drive to Portland. Will stay at the Portlander Inn again on Sunday night and then head to Shriners’ hospital on Monday, March 21st. in the early afternoon for Elias’ pre-op. Will stay at the hospital that night with Elias and the next morning at 5:30 am he will be taken away for surgery.

Meanwhile I think I need to up my head meds (Cipralex 20) b/c I’m starting to cry at the drop of a hat. It totally catches me by surprise and I’ll just start talking to someone and then get all teary and I can’t stop. I am so lucky that my boss is not only the best boss in the world but she's also become my friend and the one I usually break down to.

I know we’re doing the right thing by having these two surgeries/traction etc. but there is a part of me that wonders if it’s all necessary and then I look at his back and it looks like a train wreck and he feels really uncomfortable so I know we are doing the right thing.

[jrnyc]

dear Elisa
of course it is necessary...you know that in your heart of hearts, i am sure...
you are just having last minute jitters, i bet, now that the plans are in black and white...
very normal, to be expected!
almost like wedding last minute jitters!
please try not to second guess and torture yourself, though to some degree, i guess it is to be expected....

i would suggest...not as any medical person, cause i am not, but as a licensed social worker and as a scoli patient...that you take whatever meds the doctors have given you that they (and you) feel will help you cope! if ever you needed them, surely this would be the time...
you are a bystander, much as you love your son and are involved...because you cannot do this for him...so therefore...you have no control...
you must put your trust and faith in the surgeons and other medical staff...relinquish your control, and hope (and pray, if you are a praying person) that it will all come out well...
once you have done all you can do...let them do their part...and your son his (which is to heal)

just my suggestions...take what you like and leave the rest...
hope i didn't offend you, because i didn't mean to...

best of luck...
jess

[Elisa]

All good points Jess, thanks. Yes, the hardest part is letting go of control and being a bystander. I think in a way it's tougher for me to have my son go through this than if it were me b/c I do feel rather helpless. I'm going to up my Cipralex from 20 to 30 this morning and see if that helps with these sudden crying spells b/c not only are they annoying, it's embarrassing. It's not like I can hide in a corner or anything b/c I'm all over the hotel doing stuff and there's guests all around and they're looking at me very strange wondering what's wrong. I did up the Cipralex for one day when we were in Portland waiting to get Elias' MRI and lung function test done and I must say I did feel quite energetic, talkative and was actually in a great mood despite the not so nice news we got the day before. Definitely worth a try.

~Leaving in 11 days.

[Ballet Mom]

I know we’re doing the right thing by having these two surgeries/traction etc. but there is a part of me that wonders if it’s all necessary and then I look at his back and it looks like a train wreck and he feels really uncomfortable so I know we are doing the right thing.

If it makes you feel any better, I think your son's case is in the no-brainer territory. A child with a curve of that size and still probably considerable growth left could end up in a really bad place without surgery. It is really out of your hands at this point.

If you had to have a two month stay anywhere, Portland is a wonderful place to do it. It's really nice. I used to photograph newborn babies at Oregon Health Sciences as a volunteer when I lived there and was in school. I have to say, I don't remember a Shriner's hospital located there...but that was a long time ago!

Good luck with your stay and your son's surgery, I'm sure he's in very good hands.

(Oh, and don't be surprised if you aren't allowed to hang your exercise bar in the ward. We are a very litigious society and if you were to get hurt, the hospital could get sued. I'm fairly sure if they see you with the bar, they will tell you to take it down).

[Elisa]

Yes Ballet Mom at least I am going to be 'stuck' in a pretty nice place like Portland, can't complain about that that's for sure. I think the climate there is pretty similar to Vancouver Island as well so there's signs of spring in the air. I was totally kidding about the exercise bar though and I'm not planning on bringing it with me. Maybe I could play around on a wheelchair and have races with the kids though, lol.

Okay, that was too much of a jump up on the meds. Going from 20 to 30 made me really sleepy and looking at all those big comfy beds with down comforters and fluffy pillows were really drawing me in like a giant magnet. Good thing it was a short day and tomorrow I will cut the pill to make it 25 and see how that goes. O_o

[Elisa]

When my son and I took the trip to Shriners' Portland in January, we travelled down with another mom Amy and her son Donovan who is seventeen and has scoliosis. She's been battling with BC Children's for as long as I have or even longer. Still no surgery date from those guys BUT she just got a call today that Donovan does now have a surgery date in Portland on May 2nd. 2011. Although that is fantastic news it leaves me wondering WTH would parents/kids do up here in BC without Shriners to bail us out eh? I seriously do not even want to think about that b/c I was at the point of picketing out front of BC Children's and I know my husband was ready to throw a grenade at the building j/k.

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/p...61347427240929

[Elisa]

I wish this first surgery was over already. The stress of it all is really getting to me lately and am having a hard time keeping it together and I break down when I least expect it. I held it all together so well while my sister and BIL were here and just when we were saying goodbye I started crying and I felt so dizzy and now I'm back in bed with my heating pad b/c I'm so cold. This is going to be the longest week of my life! My son's back looks worse to me, or maybe I'm just imagining it I don't know. I do know that he's now putting both hands on his hips/back end when he walks as though he's trying to support himself. This is horrible and I wish I could do something right this minute b/c I feel so absolutely helpless. Can time move any slower!?