September 9th surgery

[mabeckoff]

Melissa, i am not surprised that you are exhausted...
if you look at your signnature, it shows you had surgery after surgery....
it is like falling, getting up, and falling again...
it is going to take time to rebuild stamina...
i think the exhaustion is just your body's way of saying..."enough for now...time to rest"...
please try to see it as a sign your body is trying to protect you from doing too much too fast...

jess

I know Jess but I have been feeling so bad for such a long time that I get upset when I still don't feel better. I know that I have at least 12 months ahead of me in order to say how good or bad I will feel. Thanks for checking up on me

[mabeckoff]

Many of us say our recovery is marked by two steps forward, one back. Sometimes two back. I still think your feeling of well-being on the weekend is a step in the right direction. And your arm is improving! Things are looking up. Just rest when you need it and try not to push yourself on the days you're tired. I bet it won't be long before you have more good days than bad.

I hope that you are right . I need good days but I do need to rest when my body tells me to. Thanks for looking after me

[mabeckoff]

Tues morning = every muscle is still yelling at me. Is it the weather, which is cold here or what?

[mabeckoff]

I just got thru with my OT for an hour. She keeps telling me that I am doing better. I do not see it but she does

[JenniferG]

Allocate these days when you don't feel you're making progress, to resting, reading, watching tv and sleeping. In other words, just get through them. When the good days happen, enjoy the minute. I believe there will soon be more good days than bad. This will improve for you. I can't remember if you've seen the fibro specialist yet? I'm hoping for some progress from him because it could be that much of the pain you're feeling is due to that, rather than the surgeries. It's such a tricky one, fibromyalgia.

Thinking of you.

[mabeckoff]

Allocate these days when you don't feel you're making progress, to resting, reading, watching tv and sleeping. In other words, just get through them. When the good days happen, enjoy the minute. I believe there will soon be more good days than bad. This will improve for you. I can't remember if you've seen the fibro specialist yet? I'm hoping for some progress from him because it could be that much of the pain you're feeling is due to that, rather than the surgeries. It's such a tricky one, fibromyalgia.

Thinking of you.

Yes I agree. I do feel that my fibromyalgia is to cause some of my pain. I am seeing the fibro doctor on January 4th. Thanks for looking after me.I need that

[mabeckoff]

I am getting very depressed. I am really amazed that I have made it this far into December with out falling apart. Christmas has been hard for me since 2002 ,
when my mom died but I was able to distract myself doing things with the kids.The kids are no more around to do stuff with me. As you know , Allyson is in NC and my 16 1/2 year old son is off doing his own things.We are living in a very small rental with all of my Christmas things packed in boxes where I cannot get to them.
Even if I had my things, I am not able to do much as my arm does not want to behave. I cannot make cookies.I do not know how I will wrap with one hand. I did my shopping, most of it. I miss my friends back in NC and NJ,

Thanks for listening.

[LindaRacine]

If I recall correctly, you're seeing the doc tomorrow. Hope you can get on a good antidepressant. It could make a huge difference.

[mabeckoff]

If I recall correctly, you're seeing the doc tomorrow. Hope you can get on a good antidepressant. It could make a huge difference.

I saw Dr Bederman last Wednesday and will not see him until 1/4 which is when I see the fibro doctor as well. He did not feel that antidepressants are in his field of knowledge. My GP will not prescribe any antidepressants for me because I am on Lycria and Cymbalta . He wants me to see a psychiatrist but I cannot get a
appt until after the first of January
So I have to go thru the next several weeks

[LindaRacine]

I saw Dr Bederman last Wednesday and will not see him until 1/4 which is when I see the fibro doctor as well.

Where DOES the time go (probably not very funny to you, since time is probably dragging by at the moment).

He did not feel that antidepressants are in his field of knowledge. My GP will not prescribe any antidepressants for me because I am on Lycria and Cymbalta . He wants me to see a psychiatrist but I cannot get a
appt until after the first of January
So I have to go thru the next several weeks

Hang in there. I promise, it will get better. You're not seeing improvement, but I can guarantee the rest of us are noticing it. The fact that you've been out shopping and socializing is huge. Remember that it was < a month ago when you couldn't do anything. Don't expect to notice changes day-to-day. Unfortunately, that type of day is few and far between, if at all. And, as you already know, some days you'll feel worse than you did the day before. But, overall, you're making progress.

--Linda

[mabeckoff]

Thanks Linda . I know that I am making progress but it is slow.( I feel). I need reinforcement from other

[JenniferG]

So often, I wish I could just wave a magic wand. I know things will get better for you, but you've waited so long and been in so much pain and had lots of other concerns to deal with. I can only imagine how hard these months and years have been. Anybody would feel depressed under the same circumstances. But I agree with Linda. There are improvements, however small they must seem to you, and they will keep coming.

Things can just seem worse at Christmas time too, because we're supposed to be happy and jolly.

Do what you can without pushing yourself and accept that things won't be how you want them to be this year, but perhaps next year Christmas will be a lot closer to how it should be.

[rohrer01]

Melissa,
I hope you are feeling better today. It's not just NOT feeling well or the holidays. You have to remember what time of year it is. Even if you are in CA, the days are shorter, the weather is gloomier, etc., especially around San Diego (don't know why that is) and Northern CA gets it pretty bad as well. Weather has a LOT to do with how we feel. I know that my aches and pains get worse when there is a change in weather coming, as I'm sure others. You've just had how many MAJOR surgeries? I'd expect your internal weather barometer is going haywire! Not to mention the depression on top of it all. You really can see progress as you read through your posts. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to go down a walk through memory lane and read through your posts about this whole experience, not just this surgery, and compare where you are now. Anyway, I am just thinking about you and hoping that today is a better day for you. Take care.

[mabeckoff]

Melissa,
I hope you are feeling better today. It's not just NOT feeling well or the holidays. You have to remember what time of year it is. Even if you are in CA, the days are shorter, the weather is gloomier, etc., especially around San Diego (don't know why that is) and Northern CA gets it pretty bad as well. Weather has a LOT to do with how we feel. I know that my aches and pains get worse when there is a change in weather coming, as I'm sure others. You've just had how many MAJOR surgeries? I'd expect your internal weather barometer is going haywire! Not to mention the depression on top of it all. You really can see progress as you read through your posts. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to go down a walk through memory lane and read through your posts about this whole experience, not just this surgery, and compare where you are now. Anyway, I am just thinking about you and hoping that today is a better day for you. Take care.

Thanks for thinking of me. You are correct with the shortened days it is depressing.

[mabeckoff]

I just want to feel better. Today I had OT and now everything hurts again