Need Support

[Janet]

MishP & Ann,

My surgery will be 11 - 12 weeks after yours. Is there a master calendar on this site of upcoming surgeries? It would be nice to know who else is getting ready to get to the other side

Without this forum, I would not have found Dr. Boachie, nor learned about all the pre- and post-op issues. Someone sure is looking after me to have pointed me here. Thank you everyone for sharing your concerns & suggestions. Keep on posting!

[CHRIS WBS]

Janet,

Nothing happens by chance. I truly believe that.

Chris

[Houston Curves]

Thank you...

Thanks!! I will be thinking of you too MishP and Janet! GOOD LUCK!

Ann

[KleinJ]

Hi there,

I too know how you feel. I was so worried about my husband and kids before my surgery. Mine are almost 9,6 and 3. It helped me to make out lists of daily schedules of who needed to be where and when. I felt like I was leaving a road map to get them through the week I was in the hospital. Others have said it before but you don't look your best after surgery and it might be better not to have the kids visit while you are in the hospital. Do you think you husband would feel better if he read through people's experiences on this site? Anya's husband is a great role model!

A friend on this site told me about Peggy Huddleston's book Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster. This book helped very much by teaching me some relaxation techniques and ideas about healing statements.

You are not alone. This is a fabulous site for airing your concerns before surgery and sharing your progress when you are recovering.

You will be a new and improved mom!

Best,
Jody

[Shari]

Hi Janet,

I usually don't respond when someone has already gotten such a wealth of great advice!!!! But I just wanted to share my support too!!!

Regarding your husband, if he is anything like mine was, he choose to put it on the back burner out of fear. They never want to show emotion or weakness. But I have a feeling that he may have been scared as well!!! I had my husband read some of the past posts before my surgery, hoping it would make him more prepared afterwards.

Try to keep in mind that it's as hard on them to watch us go through this surgery. I think it's painful for them to see us go through what we have to go through, and they would never admit it at the time. Not that this is any comfort but I think it can cause some problems if you don't address it!!! It did for me!!!

Shari

[Janet]

Hi Shari,

Thanks for your positive comments re husbands, but perhaps you meant them to be directed to MishP ( we are both patients of Dr. Boachie)? While I don't have a husband, I do have a 25 year-old son, and I think the same fear and denial exists for him. He has been very clear that he feels the surgery is necessary (when he saw my most recent x-rays, he was taken aback) yet I feel he is suppressing all emotions about it. I doubt if he would sit down and actually read anything on the forum - it's been suggested to him. So I have made a point of telling him information I gleaned from the posts so he can know what to expect. I don't throw too much at him at once so he won't be overwhelmed - just bits of info every so often. He also knows that I have been communicating with several women who were/are patients of Dr. Boachie, and that I hope to meet with them on my next trip to NYC/NJ, prior to my surgery.

[crepehanger]

Just wanted to recognize...

My heart goes out to all of you who have to travel so far to have your surgeries. I can imagine how difficult a long stay would be to coordinate all the way across the country, much less combining it with a major surgery. You have good planning skills to pull that off ! I would have felt very overwhelmed, and I admire your strength and courage to face your journey. But, I guess it would keep your mind busy as the time nears!
I started involving my family, all men, right from the start, because, I knew that I had to get them used to the idea that I might not be able to go to the bathroom alone. Boy, that will sure clear the room in a hurry!!!

[Janet]

I started involving my family, all men, right from the start, because, I knew that I had to get them used to the idea that I might not be able to go to the bathroom alone. Boy, that will sure clear the room in a hurry!!!

LOL!

Thanks for the encouraging words re x-country travel.

[Shari]

Hi Janet,

That's an oops!! I was responding to MishP. Sorry about that.

Shari