Hello Guys , first i'd like to thank that recent yahoo article about scoliosis that gave me an idea to search for a scoliosis support forum , I searched years ago but there wasn't much back then , so thanks to this forum and to Joe for accepting me here.
I'm not good in expressing my thoughts so here it goes... When I was still young , I hardly noticed anything different from my back. It was in grade 6 ( 12 years old ) when I stretched my arms as far as I could on both arms and then looking at my back in the mirror , I noticed there was something wrong with my shoulder. My uncle who's a doctor just told me to correct my posture ( no clue it was scoliosis that time ) and i'll be just fine.
It was when I was 15 when I started to grow fast during the summer. I always noticed why I look weird in my pictures , my head was like leaning to the other side and I wasn't facing straight in pictures. Still I choose to ignore it and it doesn't seem to look that bad. Last year in highschool , 16 , again i grew a few more inches and my scoliosis progressed even further. This was the start of my struggle. When I began to be conscious especially when im not home , at school , mall and any other public place. I keep thinking about my back and how some people would say something that I slouch. I come from a country where a 6 foot male ( and up ) is an uncommon height and you will "easily" stand out in the public crowd , and you hear people saying you are so tall, are you a basketball player or something. My fear of people saying something about my back kept me from enjoying my last days in highschool , it was a painful struggle knowing my condition will only worsten if I don't do something about it.
So it was in 1st year college that I finally decided to talk to my parents about it and it's been my kryptonite for a few years now. So we went to see the an ortho doctor and I was hoping that he would suggest I use a brace but he told me it was too late , my bones are already mature and he couldn't do something with my curvature. I think it was around 30-40 that time. The physiatrist also measured my curve and suggested to my P.T some scoliosis exercises. Everytime I go in hallways in school I'm always nervous , I have heightened hearing so I can easily hear if people are saying something behind my back ( there were times when I could hear them that it would really make me sad ). In classes , I usually sit at the back and I would be so nervous if the teacher would call me to get my paper's or speak in front. You see , I have no problem in public speaking in a large audience , it's just that going there to that point ( in front facing the audience ) , people will get to see my back.
I'm a type of person when I want to do something I do it , but because of my fear , it draws me back into sadness. I should have been active in the student council , or played in the basketball varisity , or took law or medicine or wear tshirts or just relax while walking in school and not rushing like there's no tomorrow , but I couldn't =( I know for some people it's just a state of mind , or try to ignore what other people say about you , but it's hard. It's really hard... I don't know if some guys here can relate to this but if there's one way to cure scoliosis ( or I didnt have one ) , I would have been 200 percent better than what I am today.
Anyways after college , I still have social issues with my back. I always wear short sleeve polo's or long sleeve polo's folded 3/4 and it has to be a dark color , or has a pattern or the cloth must not be visible. I know some guys here might think it's weird but It's my way of coping up with my fear. Sometimes I also carry a bag so it hides my back , not sure if it works but it makes me comfortable wearing it in public when going to the mall. My relative, who's a young ortho surgeon who has operated in a lot of spinal cases ( and some scoliosis cases ) suggested that I be operated last year. My curvature was already severe ( I think 55 - 60 degrees ) and he told me it needs to be corrected. I have no doubt in his abilities but an operation would never be thesame. I'm afraid of not being to move freely like in playing sports , and having a scar on my back or even any post-conditions that might happen after the surgery. So this is me now , a man who has no fear in life except when someone looks/comments at my back.
When Im facing infront of people I have no problems ( not sure why but I somewhat seem normal in front or people dont notice it ) until I turn my back. My back doesn't really hurt except when I stand for too long, like 2 hours or more when I put my hands on my hips to ease the pain a bit. I know my life has been unsymmetric for years now but im still hoping there's a cure to my fear , and reduction of my curvature .I have seen an article a few years ago about a patient who was treated during the 1900 - 1930 ( not sure what exact date ) and this girl was not operated but instead she was given a set of stretching exercises to correct her curvature and was considered successful. I also saw a youtube video that yoga can help with scoliosis , and I read of a news article of a male yoga teacher who has scoliosis , and been practicing for 3-5 years, corrected at least 5 percent and he grew an inch or so. I haven't tried yoga yet or visited a chiropractor. But im saving up some funds for abroad hopefully next year , to have my back checked by a chiro there in the states or maybe a yoga scoliosis instructor. My last resort would be operation , but I really hope it won't happen. It might correct my fear, but I would never be thesame.
I'm not good in expressing my thoughts so here it goes... When I was still young , I hardly noticed anything different from my back. It was in grade 6 ( 12 years old ) when I stretched my arms as far as I could on both arms and then looking at my back in the mirror , I noticed there was something wrong with my shoulder. My uncle who's a doctor just told me to correct my posture ( no clue it was scoliosis that time ) and i'll be just fine.
It was when I was 15 when I started to grow fast during the summer. I always noticed why I look weird in my pictures , my head was like leaning to the other side and I wasn't facing straight in pictures. Still I choose to ignore it and it doesn't seem to look that bad. Last year in highschool , 16 , again i grew a few more inches and my scoliosis progressed even further. This was the start of my struggle. When I began to be conscious especially when im not home , at school , mall and any other public place. I keep thinking about my back and how some people would say something that I slouch. I come from a country where a 6 foot male ( and up ) is an uncommon height and you will "easily" stand out in the public crowd , and you hear people saying you are so tall, are you a basketball player or something. My fear of people saying something about my back kept me from enjoying my last days in highschool , it was a painful struggle knowing my condition will only worsten if I don't do something about it.
So it was in 1st year college that I finally decided to talk to my parents about it and it's been my kryptonite for a few years now. So we went to see the an ortho doctor and I was hoping that he would suggest I use a brace but he told me it was too late , my bones are already mature and he couldn't do something with my curvature. I think it was around 30-40 that time. The physiatrist also measured my curve and suggested to my P.T some scoliosis exercises. Everytime I go in hallways in school I'm always nervous , I have heightened hearing so I can easily hear if people are saying something behind my back ( there were times when I could hear them that it would really make me sad ). In classes , I usually sit at the back and I would be so nervous if the teacher would call me to get my paper's or speak in front. You see , I have no problem in public speaking in a large audience , it's just that going there to that point ( in front facing the audience ) , people will get to see my back.
I'm a type of person when I want to do something I do it , but because of my fear , it draws me back into sadness. I should have been active in the student council , or played in the basketball varisity , or took law or medicine or wear tshirts or just relax while walking in school and not rushing like there's no tomorrow , but I couldn't =( I know for some people it's just a state of mind , or try to ignore what other people say about you , but it's hard. It's really hard... I don't know if some guys here can relate to this but if there's one way to cure scoliosis ( or I didnt have one ) , I would have been 200 percent better than what I am today.
Anyways after college , I still have social issues with my back. I always wear short sleeve polo's or long sleeve polo's folded 3/4 and it has to be a dark color , or has a pattern or the cloth must not be visible. I know some guys here might think it's weird but It's my way of coping up with my fear. Sometimes I also carry a bag so it hides my back , not sure if it works but it makes me comfortable wearing it in public when going to the mall. My relative, who's a young ortho surgeon who has operated in a lot of spinal cases ( and some scoliosis cases ) suggested that I be operated last year. My curvature was already severe ( I think 55 - 60 degrees ) and he told me it needs to be corrected. I have no doubt in his abilities but an operation would never be thesame. I'm afraid of not being to move freely like in playing sports , and having a scar on my back or even any post-conditions that might happen after the surgery. So this is me now , a man who has no fear in life except when someone looks/comments at my back.
When Im facing infront of people I have no problems ( not sure why but I somewhat seem normal in front or people dont notice it ) until I turn my back. My back doesn't really hurt except when I stand for too long, like 2 hours or more when I put my hands on my hips to ease the pain a bit. I know my life has been unsymmetric for years now but im still hoping there's a cure to my fear , and reduction of my curvature .I have seen an article a few years ago about a patient who was treated during the 1900 - 1930 ( not sure what exact date ) and this girl was not operated but instead she was given a set of stretching exercises to correct her curvature and was considered successful. I also saw a youtube video that yoga can help with scoliosis , and I read of a news article of a male yoga teacher who has scoliosis , and been practicing for 3-5 years, corrected at least 5 percent and he grew an inch or so. I haven't tried yoga yet or visited a chiropractor. But im saving up some funds for abroad hopefully next year , to have my back checked by a chiro there in the states or maybe a yoga scoliosis instructor. My last resort would be operation , but I really hope it won't happen. It might correct my fear, but I would never be thesame.
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