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  • Picture Worth a Thousand Words?

    OK well I have been lurking around, learning so much from everyone's posts, becoming scared about surgery, considering the SpineCor brace, then deciding I needed to do Core strengthening rather than wear a brace, then researching the Scroth exercises ( wish I could understand them!)... and always, always reading about everyone's surgery, recovery and - the dreaded REVISION surgeries. I've seen Dr Hanson at Baylor in Houston, but I am trying to find a second opinion doc within the Tricare health system (HA! scoffed in derision!!). Anyway - I think I am finally able to add my photos to my signature, below. One photo is my digital Xray, and then my hubby took a photo of my back as it appears now. OK, talk about humility... I am fat, but the fat folds are significantly asymetrical when viewed from behind. That's the only reason I'm posting these ugly photos- if anyone wonders what scoliosis "looks" like- well, here's a pretty good example. The folds of fat are crooked, to reflect the curvature of the spine- pretty striking view.
    I do plan to lost weight, I know it will be better on my joints, and especially on the OR staff when they are lifting me on and off the OR table ;-) IF I ever get the courage to have surgery!! ANYWAY - right now I am about 5' 8" or so, I used to 5'10" when I was in high school. I've read some threads with interest, asking about how to calculate BMI (body mass index) - do we use our actual height, or the estimated height of our skeletan, if our scoliosis was straightened? Well, that is an interesting question- my waist is all crumpled up, so how fat am I, really? anyway - it is nice to daydream about having surgery and finally having a waist. Still, it's too drastic a surgery just for vanity!! Anyway - I've posted these photos- ugly as they are- it does show what scoliosis looks like. God bless all those february surgery patients and I hope everyone is recovering - Jamie xxx

    PS- the XRAY photo is taken with me facing FRONT, so the curves are reversed from the rear view photo- from behind, my curve brings my right shoulder up higher. Should have reversed the Xray so the images correspond- sorry.
    Last edited by scooter950; 03-02-2008, 12:54 AM.
    57 years old.
    thoracic curve 68 degrees
    lumbar-sacral curve +/- 41 degrees
    Cspine C3- C7 fusion Nov. 2011 <done! success!!>, then scoli surgery T2- L4 or maybe to sacrum.
    Discogram/ myelogram pending. Surgery to be scheduled, maybe fall 2015. <scared but I know this is not going to get better>
    THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR SHARING EXPERIENCES AND KNOWLEDGE!

  • #2
    Originally posted by scooter950
    OK well I have been lurking around, learning so much from everyone's posts, becoming scared about surgery ... I've seen Dr Hanson at Baylor in Houston, but I am trying to find a second opinion doc within the Tricare health system (HA! scoffed in derision!!). ... OK, talk about humility... I am fat, but the fat folds are significantly asymetrical when viewed from behind. That's the only reason I'm posting these ugly photos- if anyone wonders what scoliosis "looks" like- well, here's a pretty good example. The folds of fat are crooked, to reflect the curvature of the spine- pretty striking view. ... Anyway - I've posted these photos- ugly as they are- it does show what scoliosis looks like. God bless all those february surgery patients and I hope everyone is recovering - Jamie xxx.
    Jamie, I am SO glad you've been lurking! ;-)

    I know the thought of surgery is scary (and, for reasons we all know, I'm glad you saw Hanson - LOL).

    Girl, I guarantee you NO ONE on this forum finds your photos *nearly* as ugly as you do (we're the beholders, and we've all BEEN there!). We know how it feels to see crooked xrays and crooked photos you knew were there, but it's still a shock.

    Repeat after me: "This is the way my back looks NOW. It's not permanent, and my husband loves me despite my "uniqueness"."

    It has NOTHING to do with who you are as a person, and it won't change who you are afterwards (unless you let it ... but you can do *that NOW ;-). Start embracing it as your back; gorgeous no matter the shape!

    Every pre-surgery back photo to me is gorgeous because it represents a strong woman ready to change her world. Lead with your mind, honey ;-)

    Hugs,
    Pam
    Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
    AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


    41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
    Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
    Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


    VIEW MY X-RAYS
    EMAIL ME

    Comment


    • #3
      Your pre-op photo

      Hi Marine mom and thank you for your kind words- actually, I loved seeing your pre-op photos, of course when I read that you modeled.... well, that explained why you had no asymetrical fat folds! ;-) So I went and tried to look at my back - and at first I was so shocked and saddened to see the fat folds- but then, I thought that the fat really illustrated the crooked spine. so.. i guess this will be my before photo... I do feel fat & ugly, and it's so discouraging to try to do something and have to stop because of pain. But ok let me stop this thread! You just wrote that we need to be positive... and distraction DOES help my pain alot. well thanks again for your uplifting point of view... and I will look forward to the day when the fat folds disappear. .. with God'sgrace and a lot of positive thinking! G'nite now! Jamie
      57 years old.
      thoracic curve 68 degrees
      lumbar-sacral curve +/- 41 degrees
      Cspine C3- C7 fusion Nov. 2011 <done! success!!>, then scoli surgery T2- L4 or maybe to sacrum.
      Discogram/ myelogram pending. Surgery to be scheduled, maybe fall 2015. <scared but I know this is not going to get better>
      THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR SHARING EXPERIENCES AND KNOWLEDGE!

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by txmarinemom
        Jamie, I am SO glad you've been lurking! ;-)

        I know the thought of surgery is scary (and, for reasons we all know, I'm glad you saw Hanson - LOL).

        Girl, I guarantee you NO ONE on this forum finds your photos *nearly* as ugly as you do (we're the beholders, and we've all BEEN there!). We know how it feels to see crooked xrays and crooked photos you knew were there, but it's still a shock.

        Repeat after me: "This is the way my back looks NOW. It's not permanent, and my husband loves me despite my "uniqueness"."

        It has NOTHING to do with who you are as a person, and it won't change who you are afterwards (unless you let it ... but you can do *that NOW ;-). Start embracing it as your back; gorgeous no matter the shape!

        Every pre-surgery back photo to me is gorgeous because it represents a strong woman ready to change her world. Lead with your mind, honey ;-)

        Hugs,
        Pam
        Pam,

        A lot of those sentiments can be applied to ANYTHING in life. You have a great outlook and even though I have not had surgery, I always read your posts because there's always some good advice in there - whether one is post-op or not.

        Hugs,
        mariaf305@yahoo.com
        Mom to David, age 17, braced June 2000 to March 2004
        Vertebral Body Stapling 3/10/04 for 40 degree curve (currently mid 20's)

        https://www.facebook.com/groups/ScoliosisTethering/

        http://pediatricspinefoundation.org/

        Comment


        • #5
          Jamie,
          Your pre op pictures look very similar to mine, in my opinion. I had mine taken the night before surgery. I remember looking at the digital camera and thinking there must be some mistake. I couldn't possible look like that. Then I told my daughters they shouldn't have let me go out on the beach looking like that. About 24 hrs later I looked down and saw a fairly flat tummy for the first time in a very long time. When I finally got home from the hospital and could stand in front of a mirror I cried. I couldn't believe how very different I look now. All of those twists and crumpled fat folds are gone. Well I thought they were fat folds. Turns out I was just smooshed. Your pictures are beautiful even if you can't see it yourself. Quit being so hard on yourself. I know its difficult to look at yourself and see the folds and the crumpled body but we are all our own worst critic. Try an honor the Goddess inside you. She's there, we can see her!

          Pam and Mariaf,
          You both said it all!

          XO Alicia
          Geish
          47 years old, dx at 13
          +30* to the right, +60* to the left, +30* to the right
          Surgery 12-13-07 - fusion from T4 to sacrum.


          http://www.scoliosis.org/forum/attac...tachmentid=267 Pre surgery
          http://www.scoliosis.org/forum/attac...tachmentid=268 Post surgery
          http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t...s/DSC01091.jpg Xray from the side
          http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t...1089-1-1-1.jpg Xray from the back

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Geish
            I know its difficult to look at yourself and see the folds and the crumpled body but we are all our own worst critic. Try an honor the Goddess inside you. She's there, we can see her!
            Jamie,

            Alicia hit the nail on the head ... WE see past the curves and see your beauty via what you write, and most of all via your bravery in making a conscious decision to BE brave.

            We're all scared going into this: Courage is nothing more than being scared and moving forward anyway ;-).

            Hugs, honey!

            Pam
            Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
            AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


            41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
            Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
            Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


            VIEW MY X-RAYS
            EMAIL ME

            Comment


            • #7
              God bless all those february surgery patients and I hope everyone is recovering - Jamie xxx
              Hi Jamie

              Thank you for thinking about others while you are on your own journey with scoliosis. My daughter is a bean pole but she had a photo taken the night before her surgery and she looked (to quote Alicia) "smooshed" too. She has just read your post and has asked if she can post a comment for you.

              Anne

              Hi Jamie! This is Annessa, I had my surgery on the 7th of February. Like you, I really didn't like the way my body looked and I would have opted for surgery even if it wasn't necessary. Although I have my good days and my bad days I don't at all regret having the surgery because I have a lovely straight body now. Your not fat OR ugly, everyone on this site has scoliosis or knows someone who has it and they will ALL tell you that you look just like everyone else who suffers from it. Good luck whatever you decide and I'll answer any questions you might want to ask about surgery. Annessa x x x
              Last edited by Neesasmum; 03-02-2008, 01:48 PM.
              Mum to Annessa, age 15
              53 degree thoracic curve down to 10 degrees.
              Date of surgery: 7th Feb 2008
              Edinburgh, Sick Kids
              Fused T4 - L1

              Comment


              • #8
                A post to Annessa ...

                Annessa, you're a very wise - and also very brave - young lady (not surprising since your Mom's pretty amazing herself).

                As I'm sure you know, sometimes life doesn't turn out quite the way we expect it to, but not everyone has the strength to roll up their sleeves and attack something like this head on. You're quite the special teenager; I have no doubt you can tackle and conquer whatever adversity life might toss your way.

                You, Sam, Elysia ... you young ladies are all my heroes, and I can't wait to read about the young women you become.

                There is nothing beyond your grasp with such a positive outlook. I'm SO proud of you all!

                Best regards,
                Pam
                Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
                AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


                41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
                Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
                Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


                VIEW MY X-RAYS
                EMAIL ME

                Comment


                • #9
                  Now I remember why I liked this place...

                  You guys are too kind! Now I remember why I felt so much "at home" when I first found this web site...!

                  Geish- you're right! Our curves were probably very similar, I love your correction! You look GREAT! how much taller are you? and thank you for your kind words of support and encouragement!

                  Anne and Annessa- You are both so kind to think about me,while Annessa is recovering from her own surgery! Yes, I guess i used the adjective "ugly" a bit often, 'eh? Well, I have always been embaressed of how I look- I always dress to camouflage my hump and crooked back. Here in South Texas, it's very HOT and so many women dress in very revealing and/or tight tank tops.. I always wear a collared loose shirt and jacket, to hide the crooked shoulder and hump back.

                  AliciaF and TX Marine Mom- thank you both as well for offering such sincere and reassuring remarks- to me, a virtual stranger and lurker! I am amazed at Pam's recovery, and at the same time encouraged - to think that maybe, if I start now, I can build my back muscles and lose weight so that I may be able to tolerate the surgery and recover in a timely manner. And despite what you say , TXMM, you DO have courage - to plan for this surgery, and plan your recovery and set goals- knowing you'll be by yourself post-op! Yikes! I've already talked to my elderly Mom about coming down to stay with me, IF I have the surgery. Even if she can't physically help me, at least she'll be good company. Besides, she's MOM ! and that alone gives me a degree of comfort... (as I'm sure Annessa agrees!!) :-)

                  My biggest concern (aside from permanant paralysis, incontinence and loss of sexual functioning) - [ this is all tongue-in-cheek! Of course the physical risks are way more serious!] -- but I really fear losing my job! I'm infertile, as well- and my job is the one way I feel I contribute. In the USA, I will be able to take up to 12 weeks off without pay, but then i must return to work- so that's even more reason to get in shape before surgery!

                  I know it's only external, but scoliosis is so deformed... and disabling. I do want to be straight- I've read a bit about the scroth method, and I've tried to consciously re-adjust my posture to regain balance. I try to rotate my torso and stand erect, but it's painful on the concave side. And I can only maintain that stance for a very short time.

                  But I'm still learning more about surgery, and thank you all for posting here so often and in such detail. I have learned SO MUCH from reading all the pre-op and post-op questions/ comments and hints that everyone shares so freely.
                  Thanks again for your support, and I especially enjoy seeing everyone's photos! The before and after photos are so dramatic and encouraging! God bless you all, and -- to use a tried and true motto: Semper Fi !!
                  Jamie
                  57 years old.
                  thoracic curve 68 degrees
                  lumbar-sacral curve +/- 41 degrees
                  Cspine C3- C7 fusion Nov. 2011 <done! success!!>, then scoli surgery T2- L4 or maybe to sacrum.
                  Discogram/ myelogram pending. Surgery to be scheduled, maybe fall 2015. <scared but I know this is not going to get better>
                  THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR SHARING EXPERIENCES AND KNOWLEDGE!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Jamie
                    I think I gained 2 inches in height or pretty close to it. A lot of the t shirts I wore before surgery are now belly shirts!

                    I started going to the gym at 12 weeks pre op to try and get stronger but by the time surgery was 4 weeks away I was just too tired to go any more. Before that I hadn't set foot in a gym in years. I think if you work on cardio and leg and core strength that will benefit you the most after surgery. You will use your legs a lot and remember it will be a while before you can do anything to strengthen your abs after so core strength before is a great benefit.

                    I also recommend building up bicep and tricep strength. I have to push up from laying on my side everyday. The first few days it was a bit tough and my upper arms got a little sore, so if you can prepare for that it will help you in the long run. I'm not sure but I think that building up the back might not be the best idea since they cut those muscles anyway, but I'm not sure. However I didn't think about that before surgery and of course I lifted weights to build back strength! Any way any little thing you can to do get stronger and build endurance and stamina will benefit you.
                    Geish
                    47 years old, dx at 13
                    +30* to the right, +60* to the left, +30* to the right
                    Surgery 12-13-07 - fusion from T4 to sacrum.


                    http://www.scoliosis.org/forum/attac...tachmentid=267 Pre surgery
                    http://www.scoliosis.org/forum/attac...tachmentid=268 Post surgery
                    http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t...s/DSC01091.jpg Xray from the side
                    http://i156.photobucket.com/albums/t...1089-1-1-1.jpg Xray from the back

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by scooter950
                      ... maybe, if I start now, I can build my back muscles and lose weight ...
                      Ooooh, Jamie ... Build your arms and legs, but DON'T build your back muscles (just streeeeeeeeetch them). It actually makes the surgery tougher to build up your back ... it's just more they have to get through.

                      You'll need you quads and hamstrings the most, and your shoulders/biceps a close second.

                      Other than that, concentrate on flexibility! ;-)

                      Regards,
                      Pam
                      Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
                      AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


                      41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
                      Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
                      Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


                      VIEW MY X-RAYS
                      EMAIL ME

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Exercise

                        Well I think I will try to exercise, and strengthen my shoulders and upper back muscles. These are exercises I did when I went thru PT last year, for pain control. And it did seem to help- it's just so much more difficult to stay on track when you're not actively going to therapy! Home exercise regimen... right! Doesn't mopping the floor count? Well it should! Trying to mop a floor kills my back! anyway ! Thanks again for the support, and I may remove my photo shortly; I still can't bear to look at it. Hope everyone is continuing their recovery without too many setbacks (or constipation!!)
                        God bless!
                        57 years old.
                        thoracic curve 68 degrees
                        lumbar-sacral curve +/- 41 degrees
                        Cspine C3- C7 fusion Nov. 2011 <done! success!!>, then scoli surgery T2- L4 or maybe to sacrum.
                        Discogram/ myelogram pending. Surgery to be scheduled, maybe fall 2015. <scared but I know this is not going to get better>
                        THANKS TO EVERYONE FOR SHARING EXPERIENCES AND KNOWLEDGE!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I'm still close enough to surgery, when one of my girlfriends drops in and asks "whatcha need?", the answer is always "Wellllll, you could mop real quick if you want ..." - LOL.

                          All's fair, I suppose, when they are WELL aware I hate to mop (plus my lil' duplex is all hardwood and linoleum, but only 600 sq.ft. It takes longer to fix the mop bucket than the actual mopping ;-).

                          Pam
                          Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
                          AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


                          41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
                          Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
                          Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


                          VIEW MY X-RAYS
                          EMAIL ME

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by scooter950
                            Well I think I will try to exercise, and strengthen my shoulders and upper back muscles. ..... Thanks again for the support, and I may remove my photo shortly; I still can't bear to look at it.
                            I found my balance ball *invaluable* for building up core strength and stretching before surgery. Most come with instructions for different fitness levels, and you can REALLY get great stretching through the torso with these.

                            Cheap, and they don't require much room to store. I even use mine as a desk chair half the time (it really helps keep you from slouching, and for me, lesss slouching = less pain). Can't wait until my doctor turns me loose on mine again for exercise!

                            Personally, I don't think you should take down your picture. No one here finds it the least bit abnormal - and certainly not unattractive.

                            Besides, once you're all nice and straight, you're just gonna post it again to show the difference - LOL!

                            Regards,
                            Pam (who really needs to pull the pics my technologically challenged Mom tried to take of MY back the morning of surgery to see if my back is even IN the photos! Off to check on that now ...)
                            Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
                            AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


                            41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
                            Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
                            Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


                            VIEW MY X-RAYS
                            EMAIL ME

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by scooter950
                              Well I think I will try to exercise, and strengthen my shoulders and upper back muscles. These are exercises I did when I went thru PT last year, for pain control. And it did seem to help- it's just so much more difficult to stay on track when you're not actively going to therapy! Home exercise regimen... right! Doesn't mopping the floor count? Well it should! Trying to mop a floor kills my back! anyway ! Thanks again for the support, and I may remove my photo shortly; I still can't bear to look at it. Hope everyone is continuing their recovery without too many setbacks (or constipation!!)
                              God bless!
                              Great pictures. Thank you for your courage for the world to see your back.
                              Please visit: www.sammonspreston.com and click on "stall bars" C9256-32. By using this tool and strong therabands you can beguing to re-habilitate your small spinal rotators and give your paraspinalis muscles a small gentle traction special in the apices of your curves.
                              Every time you bend forward you cause dysfuntion in your segmental vertebra that causes the torsions and increases pain.Send me a PM.

                              Comment

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