Hi,
This topic is covered in Dave Wolpert's book, The Patient's Guide to Scoliosis Surgery. He talks about his varying opinions and how he made his decision, although I am sure there are differences between adult scoliosis surgery vs adolescent.
That said, part of the equation is definitely finding the "right" doctor that you trust, that communicates well with you and your child, in an office that will be easy to work with for follow-up care and questions. I don't see anything at all wrong with getting so many top opinions---you should come out of those 4 appointments with a very good understanding of your options. It can also be helpful to ask for the names and numbers of 2-3 other families whose children have had surgery with the surgeon you are considering. Ask the other parents about communication between the parents and the doctors, pain control, thoroughness/ease of aftercare, and hospital experiences good or bad.
Best of luck to you with your appointments and decisions. You are leaving no stone unturned and your child will be thankful someday.
Gayle, age 50
Oct 2010 fusion T8-sacrum w/ pelvic fixation
Feb 2012 lumbar revision for broken rods @ L2-3-4
Sept 2015 major lumbar A/P revision for broken rods @ L5-S1
mom of Leah, 15 y/o, Diagnosed '08 with 26* T JIS (age 6)
2010 VBS Dr Luhmann Shriners St Louis
2017 curves stable/skeletely mature
also mom of Torrey, 12 y/o son, 16* T, stable