How to help my child accept the idea of hardware inside her body??

[Resilience]

As my family and I prepare for VBS for my daughter I am sure I will have many questions to post to this wonderful experienced group.

Here's the first: My daughter is concerned about having the staples inside her body. Since I have no hardware myself, it's difficult for me to imagine.

Any advice appreciated.

Thanks!

[mariaf]

Hi,

My son does not feel the staples at all. Based on parents I have spoken to, it seems these children can't even tell they are there. At least I have never heard of a child feeling the hardward the way one might be able to feel a rod. Hope this helps.

Of course, no matter what others say, your daughter may be nervous (as each child has their own set of concerns, understandably, prior to surgery).

I hope hearing about the experience of others is helpful to her.

Best of luck,

[rohrer01]

Maybe you can associate it with something she is more familiar with, like dental fillings. Even if she doesn't have any fillings, you can explain that they are permanent but can't be felt. There are other surgeries like apendectomies where the surgeon leaves behind little clips that can only be seen on x-ray but not felt. Reassure her that after she recovers from surgery, she won't feel the clips. I'm not a VBS mom, but I am a mom and that would probably be my approach. I hope this helps some and you aren't offended by me posting on your thread due to lack of my own experience with VBS. I wish all the best for you and your daughter.

Sincerely,
Rohrer01

[mariaf]

What a great comparison to dental filings! I hadn't thought of putting it that way, but I'm sure that's something a child that age can understand.

I hope you don't mind if I steal that line and use it in the future :-)

[rohrer01]

I don't mind at all. That's why I mentioned it. We are here to help each other, right? Any suggestion that will help calm a child's fear is worth using. I'm just glad you like it. :-) I'm just so leary about offending people lately by posting on threads that don't necessarily pertain to me. I got chewed by someone for it and feel really bad. :-(

[mariaf]

I absolutely agree. Your intention was clearly to help, and that's all that matters. Someone once told me as long as your heart is in the right place, and YOU know it, don't worry about what anyone else thinks.

I had posted to Resilience on the VBS site that David doesn't feel his staples, but thought I would reply here too in case another parent sees it and it might be of help to them - because as you say, helping others is why we are here in the first place :-)

[Resilience]

Thanks for the well wishes and creative idea. Just as I thought, someone not as stressed as I am would have some great insight. Appreciated.

[rohrer01]

You're most welcome! I hope it works... :-)