View Full Version : Seven Days and Counting...

05-15-2006, 10:48 AM
The big day is approaching rapidly and I am feeling really down and depressed. I feel like no one, outside of the people on this board, understands me or even wants to for that matter. Have any of you experienced this right before surgery? Is this par for the course or do I have some serious psychological issues? I have my pre-op consult this afternoon. I'll let you all know how it goes.


05-15-2006, 12:33 PM
Hey Brandi, it's tough for those who aren't going through this to understand all our thoughts,concerns and fears. you might think they don't get it but they will rally around you in your time of need. I found a lot of my friends didn't seem to care all that much untill it was over and then the love and support poured in. You are on your way to recovery once the surgery is over.....your pain will eventually end & not continue to get worse. There will be ups and downs but it is worth it. I still stare at my straight back in amazement every day, be they good or bad. I wish you the best and try to focus on the positive side. I can't believe how good everything I put on looks! Think of that! Best wishes,Suzy

05-15-2006, 02:21 PM
I only really found support(as I still do) from my parents and hubby. Some friends of my parents given they were older were very nice and supportive, but people my age like friends and even my sister still don't get it. I have lost a lot of friends due to these surgeries and pains, but in the end that's when you see who is truly there for you, even if nobody can understand exactly what you're going through, except for people who've had the same surgery and even then our experiences are not all exactly the same. Of all my friends there was one that understood what I went through, and that is b/c she's a naturally compassionate person and battled cancer. Just try to remind yourself why you're doing this, and lean on the people that you can trust and forget about who still doesn't get it afterwards. You're so fortunate that you can come here, I didn' have the internet back when I had my surgery and the moment I found a woman IRL that I got in contact through phone who had the same surgery as me, it was a God send.

05-15-2006, 08:27 PM
Hello Brandi,

I understand how you feel. I've been there, done that and have the t-shirt. I care and I will be praying for you.

May the Lord be with you and your surgeon and may your surgery be a success.

Kindest Regards,

05-15-2006, 09:05 PM
You're fine...I feel the same way, believe me. I'm following you sokeep going! You'll do great! :) :) :)

05-16-2006, 05:45 AM
Really, I thank you all for helping me re-focus my thoughts and adjust my attitude. I guess I was feeling sorry for myself ( :( boo-hoo...poor me). I find myself giving advice to others facing surgery and then I don't take it myself. While I am still scared to death, I know it's going to be allright, it has to be. I won't have it any other way.


05-16-2006, 03:54 PM
The fact is no one (even your loved ones) has any idea exactly what to say to you about elective pending surgery. Unless they've experienced this or some other major procedure, they really have no perspective on the issue (hell, I haven't had any other kind of surgery, so I had no perspective either). My dad had multiple bypass surgery and my mom successfully fended off breast cancer, so they both had some sage advice about recouping in the hospital. But neither of those cases were elective (pop had a mild heart attack, so it was pretty involuntary). When confronted with the fact that you are electing to have this surgery, well, that's new ground. They know it will be tough for a while, and then it will be the best thing you could have done (that's what they keep telling me, anyway). Just remember your never really alone. Your family cares in deeper ways than you can possibly expect, and you've always got us to commiserate with.

05-16-2006, 04:25 PM
What you're feeling is all perfectly normal.
Just hang in there Brandi. :)

05-16-2006, 04:27 PM
I guess I was feeling sorry for myself ( :( boo-hoo...poor me).


You have the right to feel sorry for yourself, once in a while, everybody does :) It's a big thing. But you will get through it, and after the first few days, and those pills kick in, you'll go with the flow and take care of yourself and what you need to do.

For these last days, try to think day by day, even moment by moment if you can, and enjoy each one of them.

Lisa Poole
05-16-2006, 04:30 PM
This is major surgery. I had the same feelings before mine. I had surgery in January 2005. I felt like my husband was the only one who really understood the extreme of the surgery. I was very scared and I kept my focus on recovering and going on with my life rather than the fear. I wouldn't made it through without my faith in Lord and he took care of everything.

05-18-2006, 01:45 AM
Hi Brandi,

I have to agree with everyone here!!! We have all walked the same path of fear and doubt. However, I have never considered it an elective surgery, even though I understand why some people do. It is something we have chosen to do, to improve our lives in the future.

I wish nothing but the best for you, and my thoughts and prayers will be with you. It will be tough at first, but wait until you see and feel the results.

Thinking of you,

05-18-2006, 05:55 AM
Sincere thanks and appreciation to all of you.
It's just that fear of the unknown that gets to me. Just when I think I've conquered it, it creeps back up. I know I will be nervous and scared these next few days, but I will try to understand that it is normal and I'll get through it. I'm telling you now. As soon as I arrive at the hospital and put on one of those lovely, backless gowns, I'm asking for a little something to calm my nerves. Hopefelly, I'll be so relaxed I just won't care anymore :)