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    So, here goes....

    For those of you who've had the surgery (as I have), were any of your partners afraid of hurting you during sex? That seems to be an issue for me. My sweet husband can't forget about my recovery and relax his brain enough to enjoy. I keep reassuring him that I will definitely let him know if it hurts (!) but he says it's a mental block for him. Also, I just can't move in the same ways as before (fused to sacrum) and surgery was 9 months ago. We're still trying to figure out how to coordinate our bodies; I've looked online at suggestions for people who are disabled. It barely helps! There are many variations possible, but sometimes you just things to work the way they used to. We are both young (ish) and I really don't want to face a lifetime of this. It affects the relationship and our individual identities.

    My other question is more graphic, and really for the women out there (sorry guys), and probably requires a PM response. How do you lift your hips the right way? I know about pillows, but that only helps a little. So far, I haven't been able to get any specific recommendations from people who've had this surgery. I figure with all of the specific bodily functions discussed on here, what's one more?!

    Thanks!
    T4-Sacrum fusion, with pelvic fixation in January 2015, Dr. Lonner in NYC
    10 osteotomies, rotation from 25 to 2
    Diagnosed at age 11 with double curve, 36 and 45 degrees, Braced for 2.5 years
    At time of surgery, curves were 45 and 65 degrees
    Chronic back pain, worsening, since age 11
    Tried every pain management procedure, acupuncture, chiropractor, physical therapy ever created
    Mom of 2 cuties!

  • #2
    Hello, Mom: There was a thread a while back on this topic or maybe another thread deviated into sex.

    Yes, my husband was very afraid to have sex and feared hurting me. When the restricted time rolled by, I think that it was 6 weeks, I mentioned intimacy was OK now and he said that he wanted to wait. This was very surprising to me as I was sure that he desired intimacy. When we finally had sex, I was on the bottom....sort of, but he did not put his weight on me. He was on top, but turned to the side. I did use a pillow under my hips. I suggest a very soft comforter under your body for additional comfort.

    In addition to the usual limitations from fusion, I had a spinal cord injury last year, so I have vague electrical shock sensations in my lower extremities, difficulty moving my legs, difficulty flexing my hips, and decreased sensation below L4-5. Guess that it sounds like I am not much fun as a sexual partner.....but I wear a lot of Shalimar perfume to compensate ;+} .

    The good news is that sex does get better with time and with success.....and lots of great smelling perfume!

    Hope this helps. Send me a PM if you would like with specific questions.

    Susan
    Adult Onset Degen Scoliosis @65, 25* T & 36* L w/ 11.2 cm coronal balance; T kyphosis 90*; Sev disc degen T & L stenosis

    2013: T3- S1 Fusion w/ ALIF L4-S1/XLIF L2-4, PSF T4-S1 2 surgeries
    2014: Hernia @ ALIF repaired; Emergency screw removal SCI T4,5 sec to PJK
    2015: Rev Broken Bil T & L rods and no fusion: 2 revision surgeries; hardware P. Acnes infection
    2016: Ant/Lat Lumbar diskectomy w/ 4 cages + BMP + harvested bone
    2018: Removal L4,5 screw
    2021: Removal T1 screw & rod

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    • #3
      Thank you so much to Susan and the other PM's I received.

      Susan, I'm very impressed that you are still intimate with your husband despite all of your setbacks. The medical saga for you is endless, so it must be some spectacular sex if you're still at it! LOL...no need to reply!

      If there are any spouses on here who'd like to share an opinion, that would be great. Or even ask your spouses at home about the issue of fragility and positions.

      Thanks again!
      K
      T4-Sacrum fusion, with pelvic fixation in January 2015, Dr. Lonner in NYC
      10 osteotomies, rotation from 25 to 2
      Diagnosed at age 11 with double curve, 36 and 45 degrees, Braced for 2.5 years
      At time of surgery, curves were 45 and 65 degrees
      Chronic back pain, worsening, since age 11
      Tried every pain management procedure, acupuncture, chiropractor, physical therapy ever created
      Mom of 2 cuties!

      Comment


      • #4
        I tried PM you but it said that your box is full

        Meliss
        Melissa

        Fused from C2 - sacrum 7/2011

        April 21, 2020- another broken rod surgery

        Comment


        • #5
          I cleared it now. Thanks.
          T4-Sacrum fusion, with pelvic fixation in January 2015, Dr. Lonner in NYC
          10 osteotomies, rotation from 25 to 2
          Diagnosed at age 11 with double curve, 36 and 45 degrees, Braced for 2.5 years
          At time of surgery, curves were 45 and 65 degrees
          Chronic back pain, worsening, since age 11
          Tried every pain management procedure, acupuncture, chiropractor, physical therapy ever created
          Mom of 2 cuties!

          Comment

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