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Visitors - how soon, how many, am I just paranoid?

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  • #16
    Originally posted by Pooka1 View Post
    With Respect To...

    sorry.

    sharon
    Thanks, I'm still learning the internet lingo!

    Marian

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    • #17
      That's not internet lingo as far as I know. I've been using that long before newsgroups, forums, etc.
      Sharon, mother of identical twin girls with scoliosis

      No island of sanity.

      Question: What do you call alternative medicine that works?
      Answer: Medicine


      "We are all African."

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      • #18
        My experience in the hospital was very different from what I've read here. I was almost 16 when I had my 1st surgery, and didn't really want my parents around all the time.

        Since the hospital was about 25 minutes from home, My parents were able to work half days the whole time, and come visit me before and after work, and I think it worked out best that way. I was able to just relax and sleep a lot, and wasn't worn out by having them around and feeling like I needed to be awake and social. They were also able to keep a somewhat normal life while still being close enough to come to the hospital immediately of something happened.

        I also had other visitors, but since it was so close to home it was easy for people to stop by for 10-15 minutes at a time. I remember several aunts and uncles coming, My ski coach and his daughter (who was also on my team) brought a poster the whole team had signed, my horseback riding instructor/ 4-h leader and the barn owner came a couple times, and a friend of mine who lived down the street from me and was close with the whole family. I didn't have any school friends visit in the hospital.
        Fused T2-L3 in March, 2000
        Hardware removed April 2003
        Living a full, active life almost 9 years later.
        Decided against thoracoplasty and revision to correct crankshafting and cervical kyphosis because right now a few more curves don't bother me enough to warrant more surgery.

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        • #19
          Originally posted by Beckymk View Post
          ... I'm thinking the only time that might be good would be say the last day before she is getting ready to go home.
          Becky,

          If they're going to drive a distance to see her on the last day, why not just wait until she gets home? The last day, they'll have pulled her off the PCA ... and that may or may not be unpleasant.

          You can't anticipate how she'll feel in the days after surgery, but I can guess she'll feel she's lost a LOT of her privacy. Doesn't put you in the greatest frame of mind for visitors, you know? (especially at that age)

          I had a few visitors ...

          PNUTTRO came twice, and she can attest I was a horrid host on her 2nd visit: My IV had infiltrated (i.e., no PCA), I was arguing with the nursing staff to get someone up there who could replace it using buffered lidocaine (they tend to blow right through my veins, and I'd rather be numb if they have to stick me 10 times!), and I was in a rotten mood. Meanwhile, I was limping along with oral pain meds and limping BADLY.

          Play it by ear, but set up some way beforehand of communicating with her friends whether they should come or not. That should cover it either way.

          Best regards,
          Pam
          Fusion is NOT the end of the world.
          AIDS Walk Houston 2008 5K @ 33 days post op!


          41, dx'd JIS & Boston braced @ 10
          Pre-op ±53°, Post-op < 20°
          Fused 2/5/08, T4-L1 ... Darrell S. Hanson, Houston


          VIEW MY X-RAYS
          EMAIL ME

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          • #20
            I know every kid is different. I was horrified when Jesse told me before his surgery about all the friends that would be visiting. The pre op staff reminded us Jesse was there to heal and shouldn't be worrying about "entertaining" . (and how he looked, etc)
            His surgery was done on a Monday. His only visitors the first 3 days were his parents and grandparents. On wednesday he was just staring to walk across his room and had the PCA removed.
            Not all the kids that said they were going to visit did.(Thank goodness) His girlfriend did visit twice and two girls from school came together one early evening. I know after his gf was there he was exhausted from staying awake so long. (he was still napping often)
            I think Jesse enjoyed the visits he got at home more because he was napping less and boredom was stating to kick in.
            Honestly, I would wait til she got home.

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            • #21
              Alexander was so totally out of it in the hospital, he only remembers who visited on the last day or two. But he wasn't up for any real conversation and wasn't capable of much interaction at all. I stayed the whole time, my husband came on and off throughout the day and my in-laws were visiting during the surgery to help with my younger son- so they visited too. Although it was nice to see people/friends/visitors, it was also stressful.

              As far as friends go, my opinion, for what it's worth, is to wait until she's home. Although maybe she's such a social girl that, despite tubes and bandages, puffiness and a foggy brain, her friends still might (if they can handle all of it) help her feel better. I found that when most kids/teens showed up to visit with their parents, they really couldn't wait to leave.

              Good luck with everything.
              Laurie

              Mother of Alexander & Zachary:
              Alex is 16 years old and in the 11th grade. He has congenital scoliosis due to a hemivertebrae at T10. Wore a TLSO brace for 3 1/2 years. Pre-op curves were T45 & L65; curves post-op are approx. T31 & L34. Had a posterior spinal fusion from T8 to L3 on 7/12/07 at age 12. Doing great now in so many ways, but still working on improving posture.
              Zach is 13 years old and very energetic.

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              • #22
                I'm thinking it definitely is better for her to wait.

                I was just thinking of all the "talk" I've been hearing from the kids. I'm actually assuming most of it is just talk and none of them are going to make the effort to come visit. At least that was my assumption until the one mom said maybe she would drive some of the kids up to see her. At least she did say she would call first to see if Carolyn would be up to it.

                We will just have to play it by ear. We really won't be in the hospital that long and now I've heard PICU about 2 days vs. the 1 day I had heard earlier...so Monday/Tuesday PICU and I've heard anywhere from Thursday to Saturday for going home.

                Definitely will just have to wait and see how things pan out.
                Becky
                Mom to DD (15) with S 48*+ curve
                Had her surgery March 9, 2009

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