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Hi Lisa,
Just to give you a different perspective - I was SO grateful that my Mum (& sometimes my Dad) were able to stay with me at the hospital through my original fusion (1999, age 12 yrs) & revision (2001), and will do so again during my upcoming revision. The nurses and doctors are (usually) fabulous, but they're BUSY. Besides being a great comfort to have family with me, it also meant that I didn't have to wait for a nurse to come to have sips of water, help me cut up food, brush my hair, shift my pillow, find a nurse in a hurry when I was nauseated/vomiting/had pain levels going through the roof, etc. etc..
During the first couple of days after surgery, your daughter will be in & out of consciousness & very doped up on pain meds....but she will still know you're there, and being there will still make a difference to her.
I don't want to scare you, but try to be prepared for your daughter's reaction as she wakes up a bit more. Post-op pain from fusion is, to be perfectly honest, quite brutal, especially over the first few days. Helping her keep some semblance of control over her pain will be very important. This may mean anything from ensuring she receives her pain meds on time, to helping her roll or move in her bed, to diverting her attention a little from the pain (e.g., talking to her about things she's looking forward to after getting out, how any pets at home are doing, what you saw on the news - anything...it's great "mother-daughter time", too). The pain will get better each day, and eventually, the rewards for having it done (reduced chronic pain, increased lung capacity, & easier mobility for me) will really start to outweigh how hard the surgery was.
As for your daughter's hospital say, I can only give you my experience from over here in Australia. Both spinal surgeries (from hazy memory) had me in hospital for about 7 or 8 days, then off school for about a month more. One thing to remember with a major surgery like this is the sheer exhaustion that often persists long after the pain levels go down. With your work schedule perhaps it wouldn't be possible, but when I returned to school each time, I started with half days for the first week or 2 because it was Exhausting.
How long you should stay home with your daughter really depends a lot on how fast/well her recovery progresses, but it sounds like you have some pretty good estimates I'd second the suggestion to make sure she's not too hazy with drugs or trying to manage drug administration/timing. Also, it might help her while your gone if she has some basic useful tools like a "grabber" (you know those pincer-like things on the extended arm??), & easy access to anything she might need (e.g., if she might need a cup from a high shelf/cupboard, leave it out for her).
Please make sure you take care of yourself during this time, too - physically and emotionally. Make sure you eat properly (I always feel guilty if my Mum misses lunch or whatever because she's sitting with me). Do you have any family or friends close by who could help you with your daughter's care now & again? Or even just someone you can talk to about things?
Keep posting & let us know how you're doing as well as how your daughter is. Sorry to have rambled so much!
Take care.
Just to give you a different perspective - I was SO grateful that my Mum (& sometimes my Dad) were able to stay with me at the hospital through my original fusion (1999, age 12 yrs) & revision (2001), and will do so again during my upcoming revision. The nurses and doctors are (usually) fabulous, but they're BUSY. Besides being a great comfort to have family with me, it also meant that I didn't have to wait for a nurse to come to have sips of water, help me cut up food, brush my hair, shift my pillow, find a nurse in a hurry when I was nauseated/vomiting/had pain levels going through the roof, etc. etc..
During the first couple of days after surgery, your daughter will be in & out of consciousness & very doped up on pain meds....but she will still know you're there, and being there will still make a difference to her.
I don't want to scare you, but try to be prepared for your daughter's reaction as she wakes up a bit more. Post-op pain from fusion is, to be perfectly honest, quite brutal, especially over the first few days. Helping her keep some semblance of control over her pain will be very important. This may mean anything from ensuring she receives her pain meds on time, to helping her roll or move in her bed, to diverting her attention a little from the pain (e.g., talking to her about things she's looking forward to after getting out, how any pets at home are doing, what you saw on the news - anything...it's great "mother-daughter time", too). The pain will get better each day, and eventually, the rewards for having it done (reduced chronic pain, increased lung capacity, & easier mobility for me) will really start to outweigh how hard the surgery was.As for your daughter's hospital say, I can only give you my experience from over here in Australia. Both spinal surgeries (from hazy memory) had me in hospital for about 7 or 8 days, then off school for about a month more. One thing to remember with a major surgery like this is the sheer exhaustion that often persists long after the pain levels go down. With your work schedule perhaps it wouldn't be possible, but when I returned to school each time, I started with half days for the first week or 2 because it was Exhausting.
How long you should stay home with your daughter really depends a lot on how fast/well her recovery progresses, but it sounds like you have some pretty good estimates
I'd second the suggestion to make sure she's not too hazy with drugs or trying to manage drug administration/timing. Also, it might help her while your gone if she has some basic useful tools like a "grabber" (you know those pincer-like things on the extended arm??), & easy access to anything she might need (e.g., if she might need a cup from a high shelf/cupboard, leave it out for her).Please make sure you take care of yourself during this time, too - physically and emotionally. Make sure you eat properly (I always feel guilty if my Mum misses lunch or whatever because she's sitting with me). Do you have any family or friends close by who could help you with your daughter's care now & again? Or even just someone you can talk to about things?
Keep posting & let us know how you're doing as well as how your daughter is. Sorry to have rambled so much!
Take care.
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