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  • #16
    Hi, I am another very worried mom who is facing the possibility of my 15 year old daughter having surgery for a 49 degree curvature. My daughter survived open heart surgery and kidney surgery as an infant and the possibility of her having to have this surgery is really freaking me (and her) out. I can't seem to calm down and not be frightened about this. This is the first time I have been on this site and reading the other mom e-mails brings tears to my eyes. It is really helpful to read about other moms going through this same thing. The e-mails from the kids are extremely hopeful. This is the closest I have gotten to dealing witht he possibility that surgery may be a reality this summer. I have mostly been in denial and desperately looking for non-surgical alternatives. Any info or support would be greatly appreciated. My e-mail address is ritaeliza@aol.com. I will check back to this website for more information each week. I'm glad you are all there. Thanks for listening. Elizabeth

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    • #17
      Ritaeliza,
      I understand where you're coming from. My mom was of course a nervous wreck when I went through my surgeries (I had a tethered cord surgery in Sept., and spinal fusion in Nov.) and it's normal for family to worry about their loved ones.
      First of all, I want to tell you you're obviously a very strong individual to begin w/, your daughter having gone through open heart surgery, kidney surgery, etc. already. Just trust and know that this spinal fusion will help decrease her curves, improve her posture, and w/having the surgery conducted now while she's still young, if it goes well, she won't have to worry about it hopefully when she's older. If all goes well, it truly is a life-changing experience, but you can make it a positive one
      "Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom."
      "Talent takes you to the top. Character keeps you there."

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      • #18
        Hi Ritaeliz,
        I know just how you are feeling along with all the other moms awaiting surgery. Its like a nightmare that won't go away. I try to be logical and positive but the emotions just take over sometimes. It does help to come here and read the messages from the kids that have come thru the surgery and are on the road to recovery. My daughter doesn't like to talk about it so I am afraid that when it comes it will be so overwhelming for her. All we moms can do is keep a positive mindset in front of our kids, reinforce that they are going to be ok and help them get through this any way we can. Hang in there. I wish I had some magic words. Pray, pray, pray is as close as I can get. I will keep posting after the surgery in April and I hope that helps other moms out there.

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        • #19
          I know it is frightening. There's not much I can add, except to repeat what other people have said. Best of luck to anyone who is having surgery or in recovery. Btw, I'm shy too, so I can relate to how that feels.

          When I was 13 I had surgery (52 deg. curve) , that was April 16, 1998. This coming Thurs. is my 19th (!!) birthday. It is almost 6 years since my spinal fusion. I felt the same as anyone else in the situation, frustrated, in denial and afraid. But all these years later I am OK and people who see me, who don't know about my back until after I or my mom tells them, say they wouldn't have guessed I've ever had a back problem. They say I look normal.

          Don't worry about your daughter (or anyone facing an op) not being able to do activities. Of course for a certain time she won't be able to do them but it's not forever. She WILL be able to do things in the long run.
          While initially surgery patients have to take it easy, they do go back to normal. For me it took about 2-3 months to start doing certain things again, but maybe that's because I was more cautious. Others might start doing things sooner.

          In 2000 I even learned figure skating and now do it regularly, only problem being my back is less flexible but that doesn't matter much. People say I have good balance and posture. A few months ago I started doing some ballet.

          I only wish 6 years ago there had been a message board like this to talk to people, but my family didn't have Internet access then even if a scoliosis board had existed.

          Andrea
          Last edited by Bleach Girl; 03-28-2004, 11:55 PM.

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          • #20
            Thanks Bleachgirl. I'm so glad to hear you are figure skating and living a normal life. Congratulations on your recovery. I am so proud of all you scoliosis survivors and so thankful for you. It gives me hope for my daughter. God bless you.

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            • #21
              peggy...

              Hey Peggy,

              I was 13 when i had my fusion for a 86% curve... That was 13 years ago this April... I was sooo scared and it was not easy for me. I was a tall girl to begin with and of couese grew 2 inches after surgery... so bending is hard for me to this day, BUT not impossible. I think the important part foryourm daughter is talkimng, she needs to talk to somebody, if not you a friend. It is very important. She needs to understand what is going on and what is going to happen in the future. 13 years there was not websites or boards like this, and this helps, i wish i had it... i am learning more about my situation now than ever before, but i think by not talkimng about it when i was young and holding things in, it is messing with my head now... Please try to get her to open up to you... or if she needs someone to talk to, i'd be more than happy to mentor... you can email me togagirl@comcast.net

              Good Luck to you and her!! It really is for the best! What area are you in??

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              • #22
                Thanks Kellie,
                I really wish I could get her to talk to others. This site has helped me trememdously. I printed out some scoliosis stories and other information about what to expect before, during and after surgery and I am going to have her read all that and talk it over with her before we go on the hospital tour. She doesn"t have any close friends which makes it hard. She is just a very private, shy person. Thanks for the offer and if I will keep working on her to come here. Glad this site has helped you. I wish you had had it at the time of your surgery too.

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                • #23
                  Hi Peggy.

                  Try not to feel too bad if your daughter doesn't want to use this forum. My 12 1/2 year old daughter won't use it either, but like you, I get a lot of support and answers from this forum. I make it a point to make my daughter talk to me if no one else to keep her up-to-date with what's going with her and also how she is feeling inside. Would your daughter consider keeping a journal? I personally keep a journal and it helps to get my feelings out sometimes.

                  Good luck,
                  Mary Lou

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                  • #24
                    Thanks Mary Lou. I will suggest the journal idea to her. And I think she is warming up to the idea of at least posting on this board post surgery so that she can share her experience. I told her not only would it help her, more importantly it would help those kids awaiting surgery who are nervous and scared like she is now.

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                    • #25
                      56 y.o. survivor of spinal fusion

                      I was fused twice at thirteen y.o. since 1960 13 vert. in all and I've been there, done that , and seen that. I was fused in Ann Arbor, Mi. by the head of the osteo dept. Dr. Badgley(now deceased) I also was scared and called home saying I didn't want to stay. Instead of putting me in the kids ward they put me in the adult floor where everyone was having stomach surgery's. Talk about being scared that was me. the first one was 7 vert. ansd the last was 6vert. I had no pain on the first one but the second one I did feel a lot of pain. I could hardly eat and then the pain meds started once that was done i felt like my old self. In my day they used bone from the bone bank. But I was one of the unfortunate ones. I developed and Infection that sometimes get started.I carry that with me the rest of my life. I just have to be careful the rest of my life. I will say one thing around the incision you will not feel pain at all. I've had a needle in my back several years ago for an infection nearly 20 years later and didn't even feel it. Trust me when i say this. everyone will do just fine and up in no time. I AM A SURVIVOR OF 40 YEARS PLUS.


































































































































































































































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