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"State of Nothingness" by Matt

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  • "State of Nothingness" by Matt

    My 4th hour English teacher told us to write a original, personal poem and this is what I came up with.....

    “State of Nothingness”
    By Ross

    Twisted and curved, my spine looked like a slinky snake.

    Month by month it progressed pushing on my heart and lungs like a freight train at full speed ahead.

    Scoliosis and Scheuermann’s Kyphosis Disease are the terribly painful culprits.

    Sitting in the waiting room full of toys in Shriners Hospital for Children-Shreveport, I look around.

    Looking at all of the kids in wheelchairs and walkers, casts and braces.

    I wonder what I’m doing here. Should I be here with such sick kids? It is really that bad?

    I see the surgeon coming down the hall with a grim, straight face.

    “Surgery is our best bet,” he says as I watch his mustache go up and down as he talks.


    Leaves have already changed outside my hospital room to the colors of fall. September was here in the blink of an eye.

    The butterflies in my stomach were having a party at 5am when the nurse starts the IV.

    I see my mom’s face drop and look sick when the surgical nurses come to take me away.

    Tears roll down my face as I say goodbye and roll away from my family and see the bright lights of the operating room.

    I sit and listen to the jokes of the surgeon as more tears roll down my cheek, knowing I will never be the same when I awake.

    Then I feel the warm sensation of my body going numb. My eyes close as I fall into a wonderland of unconsciousness.

    When I awake 6 hours later, something is different. Something is wrong! PAIN!

    Pain is engulfing my body. My fingers are numb! I can’t move my feet! What wrong with me?!

    I start to notice different things. I now have 4 IV’s and a catheter. The beeping of the heart monitor. I become more alert.

    I then fall into a land of nothingness. No pain. No hurt. Just sleep.

    After 3 days, I’m walking and eating real food! I can’t believe!

    In the suburban on I-49 homebound, I think to myself “I did it.” Tired from the journey and pain meds, I fall into a land of nothingness.
    Matt

    Rod Removal Surgery 2/4/2008
    www.myspace.com/ross40728
    Had surgery on 9/20/04
    81* Scheuermann's Disease
    40* Left Thoracic Scoliosis
    U Rod Inserted
    Fused from T2-L3

  • #2
    omg thats brilliant. its just how i felt as well... thinking how wheni woke up that i wouldnt be the same.. its very good
    *ANGIE* 14-15 y/o
    had operation in september 2004
    a rod was put in:T10-L3
    My curve was 50* & is now 7*
    "All that glitters is not always gold & diamonds in the rough do not always shine"

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    • #3
      awesome poem matt

      jennifer

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      • #4
        That's great Ross,

        It makes me sad thinking about you and at the same time my daughter when she wakes up from surgery.

        Thanks for sharing! Susanna
        Susanna
        ~~~~~~
        Mother of a 17 year old daughter. Her "S" curve was 40 degree thoracic from T3 to T9, and a 70 degree rotatory thorcolumbar from T9 to L4. She was operated on March 9th, 2005 by Dr. Boachie-Adjei at the Hospital for Special Surgery in NYC. She was fused from T11 to L3, using an anterior approach, and the major curve corrected to 20 degrees. She's doing great!

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