You sound like a great mother. Relax. Your daughter is lucky to have you. The nurse who said that your daughter should be grateful should be shot. Or at least not be working in nursing. She was inappropriate. She was so very wrong on so many levels to have said that! Tell your daughter that I said so!
My suggestion? Lay low and smile that your daughter is finally doing better. Just tell her that you are here for you, whatever she wants. You guided her through probably the worst last years of her life, you are awesome. Just help her with whatever she wants and I know that she is very happy that you believed in her all of these years. She has some of life to recoup and I know that things will be better in the future.
Congratulations mom on seeing this through. You did not cause her pain in the first surgery and I am sorry that it took so long to find a solution. Pat yourself on the back!
Susan, mom of 2 and grand mom of 4
Dxed 8/2011: Degenerative Adult-Onset Scoliosis age 65
XRAY 1/2012: 25* T levoscoliosis/ 36* L dexroscoliosis w/ 4.1 cm coronal & 3.5 cm sagittal balance
XRAY: 12/2012: Scoliosis curve same, Coronal Balance increased to 11.2 cm. T kyphosis 90 degrees
Severe disc degeneration thoracic & lumbar, stenosis esp L4
Surgery: T3 to S1 Fusion w/ ALIF L4-S1/XLIF L2-4, PSF T4-S1 in 2 surgeries,
19 & 22 March 2013, Dr. Serena Hu @ UCSF
Postop incisional hernia @ ALIF incision, repaired 3/2014