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Thread: Iam needing some empathy right about now.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Utah
    Posts
    59

    Iam needing some empathy right about now.

    So I know I have probably asked this questions 4 different ways now. Because I feel alone and a little alarmed that I am not in tip top shape. Does anyone else have a hard time meunuvering out of bed or bending over to grab something takes for ever. And I make grunting sounds. LOL Its so embarrassing. I am slow and can't keep up with my friends or my kids. I about 10 ft behind them always. And I am not at all complaining. I am just curious if this is normal. Nobody really understands what I am talking about when I discuss my back pain before and after surgery. It still hurts but its a different pain. Like I have a lot of metal in me pain. I think anyone would hurt after having a erector set installed in my lower back. 405660_10150558127944425_678931458_n.jpg

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Central NJ
    Posts
    1,956
    I don't know your story--when you had surgery, etc (although I did look at your pic). I am almost 4 years post-op and I still grunt when I bend over. For the life of me I can't help it. I'm fused T3-L3, I take it you are to the pelvis? For years I had 2 grabbers in the house that I used regularly instead of bending over. They especially came in handy doing laundry. I even have a short one in my car (still do.)

    Getting in and out of bed easily took a LONG time. Even now sometimes I still can't jump up as quickly as I like, but I can definitely do it on my own.

    How long ago was your surgery? If it was recently (within the past year), it's understandable if you feel some pain or other strange sensations. I'd say it took a good 18 months for MOST of the strange sensations to go away for me, although sometimes I still get something now and then.

    Bottom line, you don't sound abnormal to me at all! And yes, people not in this situation just can't understand like the folks on this board.
    __________________________________________
    Debbe - 50 yrs old

    Milwalkee Brace 1976 - 79
    Told by Dr. my curve would never progress

    Surgery 10/15/08 in NYC by Dr. Michael Neuwirth
    Pre-Surgury Thorasic: 66 degrees
    Pre-Surgery Lumbar: 66 degrees

    Post-Surgery Thorasic: 34 degrees
    Post-Surgery Lumbar: 22 degrees

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Central NJ
    Posts
    1,956
    I just read your previous posts on what you had done. Good lord--no wonder you're still uncomfortable. What are you 6 or 7 months out? Give yourself a break. You're far from back to normal. I only had a posterior surgery and I think it took me probably a full 2 years before I felt back to my (mostly) normal old self.

    Keep up your walking every day--it will help you heal, and get enough rest. Are you working now? The transition back to work was tough on me, and other people really don't get it.
    __________________________________________
    Debbe - 50 yrs old

    Milwalkee Brace 1976 - 79
    Told by Dr. my curve would never progress

    Surgery 10/15/08 in NYC by Dr. Michael Neuwirth
    Pre-Surgury Thorasic: 66 degrees
    Pre-Surgery Lumbar: 66 degrees

    Post-Surgery Thorasic: 34 degrees
    Post-Surgery Lumbar: 22 degrees

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Utah
    Posts
    59

    My story

    Thank you. I had my first surgery Jan. 16th 2012 and the second surgery on Jan.25 2012. I had 4 incisions,removal of half of an exciting rod in my back that broke, 2 new one installed to my sacrum and 18 new screws added in. So I have a total of 24 screws and 3 rods and one in my pelvic area. ( I can just see it on the x ray. not sure what it is.)
    THey went thru the front of my abdomen on the second surgery this year. And I guess they cut thru my muscle and now I the whole left side of my stomach bulges out pretty bad. I thought it was a hernia but they said hernia are not that big. THey told me there was nothing I could do to fix it and I would be stuck with that big pooch forever.
    So I cried pretty hard. I already walk funny now but at least I can hide most of my scars. But I can't hide the bulge.
    It looks like I have half of a front butt. lol.
    So thank you for all the support again. Ya I am back at work. I was just working 3 days a week for the last 3 months but my boyfriend just lost his job and I am a realtor so now I am going to have to work 40 hours a week to try and make some income. I don't get any kind of disability and I was bedridden a for a year before I could have the surgery. ( I had no insurance so I couldn't afford the surgery.) I got a subsidized federal insurance plan that is temporary for 3 years. So I was lucky enough to get fixed. But being down that long I lost everything. My home,my clients and source or income and my husband. So I lost everything including being able to walk in one year. It was hell. There were days It took everything for me not to call it quits. But I made it and am now healing.

    I guess I think I should be all fixed now. And I get frustrated that I am not the person I used to be and probably never will be. It changed me. Humbled me. Its funny to think about. Before I was this caulk hot 28 year old realtor and mom making 200k a year. To losing all of it including my youth all at once. So I still have a hard time with it.

    I am short selling my home as we speak. I tried to hard to save it but with no work or disability and I was single. My hubby left me in 2010 once I was unable to walk. But its all just stuff. At least I can walk now. And my kids are still with me and thats all that should matter. Its just hard from being so self reliant to needing food stamps to survive.

    I am so embarrassed of that. But I had no there choice. Thanks for letting me vent fellow fusers. 155262_488352774424_8110454_n.jpg Here is a picture of me a year before my life blew up. Being bedridden I gained 40 lbs. grrrrr

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Waterloo, IL
    Posts
    1,690
    You certainly have my sympathy. You have been through so much with your surgeries, so it's no wonder that you are still in pain. I can't imagine what you're going through emotionally as well. You will get through this rough time in your life. Stay strong & feel free to vent any time you need to. Walk as much as possible.
    Karen

    Surgery-Jan. 5, 2011-Dr. Lenke
    Fusion T-4-sacrum-2 cages/5 osteotomies
    70 degree thoracolumbar corrected to 25
    Rib Hump-GONE!
    Age-60 at the time of surgery
    Now 66
    Avid Golfer & Tap Dancer
    Retired Kdgn. Teacher

    See photobucket link for:
    Video of my 1st Day of Golf Post-Op-3/02/12-Bradenton, FL
    Before and After Picture of back 1/7/11
    tap dancing picture at 10 mos. post op 11/11/11-I'm the one on the right.
    http://s1119.photobucket.com/albums/k630/pottoff2/

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Sunshine Coast, Queensland, Australia
    Posts
    3,261
    Not surprisingly, you sound emotionally traumatised as well as physically. It takes time to come back from something like this. I like the advice others have given. You have a way to go yet so know that it will get much better. Best wishes.
    Surgery March 3, 2009 at almost 58, now 63.
    Dr. Askin, Brisbane, Australia
    T4-Pelvis, Posterior only
    Osteotomies and Laminectomies
    Was 68 degrees, now 22 and pain free

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Indianapolis area
    Posts
    966
    I'm sorry you have been through so much. But any man that will not stick by you when you are not well is not worth it, anyway. As far as the abdominal bulge, you might be surprised. I looked pretty bad six months after my c-sections, but a few years later it just kind of faded away. Best wishes!

    Evelyn
    age 44
    80* thoracolumbar; 40* thoracic
    Reduced to ~16* thoracolumbar; ~0* thoracic
    Surgery 3/14/12 with Dr. Lenke, T4 to S1 with pelvic fixation
    Not "confused" anymore, but don't know how to change my username.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Ames, Iowa
    Posts
    1,250
    Annabeller--
    My gosh, what a last few years for year. I'm so sorry you've gone through so much. You really are quite early in your recovery so you will slowly improve. It has to be doubly hard to feel well when you have so many other things going on that are so difficult to deal with. I truly hope some of these things can work out for you for the better. Concentrate on your health for sure! Hang in there. Janet
    Janet

    61 years old--57 for surgery

    Diagnosed in 1965 at age of 13--no brace
    Thoracic Curve: 96 degrees to 35 degrees
    Lumbar Curve: 63 degrees to 5 degrees
    Surgery with Dr. Lenke in St. Louis--March 30, 2009
    T-2 to Pelvis, and hopefully all posterior procedure.

    All was posterior along with 2 cages and 6 osteotomies.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    227

    Wink

    Life will never be the same but you will find your new life eventually. I'm over 2 years post-op now and am finally coming to grips to what my "new life" is and will look like. Hang in there! It will get better/easier to deal with. Take good care. (Just imagine how much grunting goes on around the world...funny if you think about it

    Always Smilin'
    Colleen

    1982 fused T2-L1
    pre op 45 - post op 33 (left thoracic)
    pre op 53 - post op 18 (right thoracic)

    recheck 2006
    right thoracic 57
    lower lumbar 34

    surgical revision April 28,2009
    revision T3-L1; new fusion L1-L4
    unsure of degrees at this point

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Yacolt, WA
    Posts
    1,524
    I'm not sure what to say except it sounds like you are on your way. Life doesn't look like you had hoped it would, nor does your body, but you're not in bed and you have a boyfriend instead of an ahole husband that left you when you needed him most. Unsure about your bulge, but there are fashions to camaflage everything. And it might get better.

    Getting back to work might be the best thing for you as you are probably GREAT at it! Just take a nap when you get home!

    Sending positive thoughts your way.
    Susan
    Adult Onset Degenerative Scoliosis @65, 25* T & 36* L w/ 11.2 cm coronal balance; T kyphosis 90*; Severe disc degen T & L stenosis

    2013: T3- S1 Fusion w/ ALIF L4-S1/XLIF L2-4, PSF T4-S1 in 2 surgeries
    2014: Hernia @ ALIF repaired; Emergency screw removal surgery for Spinal Cord Injury at T4,5 sec to PJK
    2015: Revision Broken Bil T & L rods and no fusion: 2 revision surgeries; hardware P. Acnes infection
    2016: Ant/Lat Lumbar diskectomy w/ 4 cages + BMP + harvested bone + prayer

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