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Thread: September 9th surgery

  1. #2056
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
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    1,916
    I thank you all for your kind words and advice. I really do not know what I am going to be doing medically. Right now, I am in so much right leg and knee pain that walking feels like walking on hot coals.Now my left leg calf and ankle are really starting to feel the same way. Some of you say that I should walk away from the medical community but they are the only hope that I have. I remember life when it was pain free and that is what I am hoping to get again.I do not know what surgeries I will do next but I have to hope that at some point down the line, I will start to feel better physically and then mentally should follow. I am having the brace started tomorrow and a left shoulder MRI.

    Thanks

    Melissa
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  2. #2057
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
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    1,916
    Thank you for your information and kind words. I am really at my wits end because none of my pain meds are working now . I know that surgery cannot be counted on to fix pain. Take my back for instance. Back when I started on this journey it was 2010. After my NC surgeon messed up my back, I was blessed with finding Dr Bederman. He and I right now are talking about whom I should use for my knee and left hip.

    I know that each and every one of you on the forum cares for me deeply and I thank you all

    Melissa
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  3. #2058
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Northern California
    Posts
    6,231
    Rohrer... I'll leave your post with one caveat. It cannot become an issue. If it does, I'm sorry, it will have to go. In the future, I'd recommend that this type of communication is better shared via PM. I know you understand.

    --Linda
    Never argue with an idiot. They always drag you down to their level, and then they beat you with experience. --Dilbert
    I'm sarcastic... what's your super power? --Unknown
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Surgery 2/10/93 A/P fusion T4-L3
    Surgery 1/20/11 A/P fusion L2-sacrum w/pelvic fixation

  4. #2059
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
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    1,916
    Thank you Linda
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  5. #2060
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    2,646
    Quote Originally Posted by LindaRacine View Post
    Rohrer... I'll leave your post with one caveat. It cannot become an issue. If it does, I'm sorry, it will have to go. In the future, I'd recommend that this type of communication is better shared via PM. I know you understand.

    --Linda
    Understood, of course. But if it does become a problem, please only delete that section if you can. It seems like this is a major issue and was brought up publicly, so I addressed it publicly.
    Thanks.

    Melissa,
    I'm not saying to walk completely away from the medical community. You CAN'T do that at this point. You need major pain control. What I'm trying to say is prioritize. If it's BIG, take care of it. But surgery after surgery can bring a person down. It affects the brain. Every time you go under anesthesia, the brain is affected and people react differently. You don't have time to heal from one thing and you're already having something else done. I've put off having a surgery that I pretty much need, but isn't an emergency to take care of my shoulder, which was more of a priority to me. I waited until my shoulder was as healed as it's going to get before I even scheduled to see the other surgeon. I've never had a MAJOR surgery like you have, but I've had my share. Every time I feel like garbage for a good long while. I had back to back surgeries once. I had one, they found something major (my shriveled hard white gallbladder) and was referred to surgery the next month. The next month came by and I had to cancel because I came down with pneumonia from the previous surgery, so I had to wait an extra month. I'll tell you it knocked me off my feet for awhile. Not literally, because women can't really STOP. But that was very difficult. I can't imagine going from one major thing to another the way you are. I'm suggesting spacing it out IF you can. Take care of the priority, like your leg pain, and not your shoulder. No lasting damage is likely to occur with a bum shoulder if you baby it. But nerve impingement can have lasting consequences. I guess I'm rambling. You've been through too much in too short of time. I wish it could be different for you is all.

    HUGS,
    Rohrer01
    1985 - Dx w/ painful AIS at 16 with 39* upper LEFT thoracic single curve.
    2000 - 41*
    2010 - 46* (T1 - T6) 38* (T6-L2) Now a double thoracic
    2012 - Dx w/ Cervical Muscle Dystonia.
    DDD L5/S1 with left nerve impingement
    Left SI joint dysfunction

  6. #2061
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    1,916
    I wish it could be different for you is all.

    HUGS,



    Thanks for the good wishes. I am trying to get some mental health help but it seems impossible. When I call providers that are listed as taking my insurance, only to be told that they do not accept my insurance. It seems over whelming, just like life

    melissa
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  7. #2062
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    2,646
    Quote Originally Posted by mabeckoff View Post
    Thanks for the good wishes. I am trying to get some mental health help but it seems impossible. When I call providers that are listed as taking my insurance, only to be told that they do not accept my insurance. It seems over whelming, just like life

    melissa
    Melissa, ALL hospitals have social workers to deal with mental health crisis. All you have to do is go to the ER of your hospital, the one that accepts your insurance, and talk to them about your suicidal thoughts or lack of will to live or whatever it is. THIS is a big deal! Your mental health can and does affect your physical health. If you are feeling in crisis, that is the time to go to the ER. You don't just walk in without crisis feelings. But from the sound of your posts, I think you are in crisis. We have a 211 helpline for mental health crisis where I live. Your city is larger, so I'm sure you have a 211, also. Try it and see what you can find out. They don't send anyone to your home. They just talk to you and let you know what is available in your area.

    Please take care of this aspect of your health. Without it, nothing else is going to do any good.

    HUGS,
    Rohrer01
    1985 - Dx w/ painful AIS at 16 with 39* upper LEFT thoracic single curve.
    2000 - 41*
    2010 - 46* (T1 - T6) 38* (T6-L2) Now a double thoracic
    2012 - Dx w/ Cervical Muscle Dystonia.
    DDD L5/S1 with left nerve impingement
    Left SI joint dysfunction

  8. #2063
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Sunshine Coast, Queensland, Australia
    Posts
    3,135
    Sounds like good advice there. I can't imagine what you're going through. I wish someone would help you. Times like this, we need our mothers, someone who always puts us first. It sounds like that's what you need right now, some mothering. Someone you can count on, who'll put you back on the road to good health. Which I know is still a long way off, but to help you go in the right direction. It must be very hard trying to get that elusive help yourself, with doors shutting in your face, when you already feel so low. Know that there are many here who care and want to see you feeling well, in every way. Someone must be able to help you. Don't give up. You deserve that help, Melissa! Sending hugs.
    Surgery March 3, 2009 at almost 58, now 63.
    Dr. Askin, Brisbane, Australia
    T4-Pelvis, Posterior only
    Osteotomies and Laminectomies
    Was 68 degrees, now 22 and pain free

  9. #2064
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
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    1,916
    Jennifer, you are so right.I just want my mother so much.I want her to take care of me.

    Melissa
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  10. #2065
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    1,916
    Quote Originally Posted by rohrer01 View Post
    Melissa, ALL hospitals have social workers to deal with mental health crisis. All you have to do is go to the ER of your hospital, the one that accepts your insurance, and talk to them about your suicidal thoughts or lack of will to live or whatever it is. THIS is a big deal! Your mental health can and does affect your physical health. If you are feeling in crisis, that is the time to go to the ER. You don't just walk in without crisis feelings. But from the sound of your posts, I think you are in crisis. We have a 211 helpline for mental health crisis where I live. Your city is larger, so I'm sure you have a 211, also. Try it and see what you can find out. They don't send anyone to your home. They just talk to you and let you know what is available in your area.

    Please take care of this aspect of your health. Without it, nothing else is going to do any good.

    HUGS,
    Rohrer01
    So what you are saying is ; to go to the e/r of the hospital that takes my insurance. Once there, tell them that I am in crisis and need help? Is that what you are saying?

    Melissa
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  11. #2066
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Sunshine Coast, Queensland, Australia
    Posts
    3,135
    I know that that would be what you should do here. Ask for a social worker, tell them how you are feeling and hopefully a competent social worker will be able to help you and direct you to the proper care that you need right now. I wish I could go with you. I hope you have someone to take you, to back you up, and support you. Good luck Melissa. Yes, your mother would be wonderful to have by your side, right now.
    Surgery March 3, 2009 at almost 58, now 63.
    Dr. Askin, Brisbane, Australia
    T4-Pelvis, Posterior only
    Osteotomies and Laminectomies
    Was 68 degrees, now 22 and pain free

  12. #2067
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    1,916
    Quote Originally Posted by JenniferG View Post
    I know that that would be what you should do here. Ask for a social worker, tell them how you are feeling and hopefully a competent social worker will be able to help you and direct you to the proper care that you need right now. I wish I could go with you. I hope you have someone to take you, to back you up, and support you. Good luck Melissa. Yes, your mother would be wonderful to have by your side, right now.
    I just feel so alone. Nobody with me

    Melissa
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  13. #2068
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    3,598
    Melissa please...you must help yourself...
    it is very common to miss one's parents at some point in time,
    especially when hurting or sick...but they are not there to help you...
    YOU must help you...
    just reach out and you will see that there are people who want
    to help...
    talk to Dr Bederman's office and ask them to find someone for
    you...talk to your GP's office and do the same...
    but please...do not wait...
    make a phone call...or go to the doctor's office or the ER
    as rohr suggested...
    but please do not wait for something else to happen in your life...
    everyone has troubles...seems life comes with troubles...
    when it gets overwhelming and too much to handle, it is
    time to reach out for help from someone else...

    you are suffering and need to get help...
    there is nothing wrong with that and it happens way more often
    than you might think...
    take it from a licensed social worker...
    you need to see a mental health therapist...there are many different kinds of therapy and therapists...but the way to start is to let someone know that you
    need help...like Dr. Bederman or your general physician.
    please....do what your mother would want you to do...
    since she is not here to help....

    jess...and Sparky
    Last edited by jrnyc; 04-24-2014 at 10:48 PM.

  14. #2069
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    1,916
    I have tried to get in touch with someone to talk to several times but there are weeks worth of waiting. I need to talk to someone now and I am not capable of finding someone. it is too much effort to find someone to talk with

    My brothers case has been set for May 5th. My husband has sent a paper from his boss stating that Marc needs to be in the office the first week of the month but the judge does not care. She said that the trial will go on as scheduled but when my brother's lawyer wants it changed it gets changed. This means I will be alone on Mother's Day away from my daughter on her first mother's day. Between my pain and everything else in my life, I have no reason for living
    Last edited by mabeckoff; 04-25-2014 at 10:20 AM.
    Melissa

    September 2014 - Broken Rod Surgery Dr Bederman

  15. #2070
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    2,646
    Quote Originally Posted by mabeckoff View Post
    So what you are saying is ; to go to the e/r of the hospital that takes my insurance. Once there, tell them that I am in crisis and need help? Is that what you are saying?

    Melissa
    Melissa, what I'm saying is that if you feel like you are having thoughts of killing yourself, go to the ER of the hospital that takes your insurance ASAP.
    Otherwise, call 211. It's a standard system like 911, only it's for mental health issues. It's a great resource. You don't have to be suicidal to cal 211. You can call it any time of any day and they will talk you through and find you some help. I've had to use it before for someone in my family that has mental illness.
    Mental illness is just as real as physical illness and can manifest in physical ways.
    1985 - Dx w/ painful AIS at 16 with 39* upper LEFT thoracic single curve.
    2000 - 41*
    2010 - 46* (T1 - T6) 38* (T6-L2) Now a double thoracic
    2012 - Dx w/ Cervical Muscle Dystonia.
    DDD L5/S1 with left nerve impingement
    Left SI joint dysfunction

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