Home Care Right After Surgery

[lumbar3491]

Hi All,

I understand that the first two weeks at home are the hardest, which prompts my inquiry. A dear friend will be staying with me the 2nd week I'm home, but I don't have anyone lined up for weekdays the first week. My partner will be with me on weekends but will be back teaching weekdays.

I have lots of friends who have asked to assist me, but I don't know what to tell them for that first week. What kind of care did you need your first week home? Is it worth exploring a rehab center or long term care at home?

Many thanks

Karen

[lapieper]

The first week at home I basically slept. My husband was home to help me with every whim I had: up, down, lay down, sit up. I was able to do all those things without his help, but it sure made it much easier. I could only sleep for about 1-1/2 hours at a stretch. So I would sit up, put my brace on, read for about 20 minutes, and lay back down to sleep. I don't know if anything was going numb or if it just hurt to lay in a certain position for any length of time. I slept in a different room from my husband, so he could get a good night's sleep. He checked on me frequently!

Take your friends up on all they offer. That's what friends are for! I can only speak for how I would feel if one of my friends went through this. I don't want to just watch or hear how you're doing. I want to see you, and to help you. I want to bring you food, see if there's anything else you need.

OK. Got that off my chest! I hope that helps you.

Lesley

[52skeedoo]

Importance of home care

I'm in my third week of being at home and I would highly recommend having someone around at all times during the first couple weeks.

If you are anything like I have been, you will be on very strong pain killers that make your judgment just a little less than the best. You will probably very uncomfortable much of the time. It's hard to tell exactly what you will experience but I can tell you that you will find times throughout the day that it is VERY helpful to have someone who can get your medicine or refresh your water or get your a meal or whatever it is.

My husband has been sleeping in a separate room because I don't sleep much but even at night there have been a couple times that I have used my cell phone to wake him up because I was in excruciating pain and needed help just changing my position.

After a couple weeks, I don't mind being alone for a few hours at a time, but I would not want to go for a day without assistance.

I'm glad you have friends who want to help. You might ask them to keep you company for a day or a half-day at a time.

Sheri

[Doodles]

My husband or daughters were around 24/7. I could do basically nothing and couldn't remember pills at all--when or how much. Plus I didn't get home for 2 weeks. Take up your friends offers and develop a schedule for them. You'll feel much more comfortable. Janet

[debbei]

I know there are some people who can do it alone, but I was not one of them. For the first week at LEAST, I couldn't even get out of the bed without assistance. I slept constantly. I was like a baby--I ate, slept and pooped. Like I said, there are some that do it alone, but there was no way I could have.

[JenniferG]

I didn't come home until day 19. As soon as I lay in my own bed, I knew everything was going to be fine. Oh what a difference! My partner continued working so I was home on my own during the day but I was fine. He cooked dinner and cleaned up after, he did the washing and other housework. I was able to make sandwiches and coffee etc. I had lots of visitors but I also did a lot of sleeping when I was alone. I slept 9-10 hours a night and another 3-4 during the day.

[Vali]

I came home on day eight from the hospital. My daughter would be home on
Mondays and Fridays, my husband on Tuesday and Wednesday, my friend Anne comes over every Thursday to do the vacuuming, bathroom toilet and floors and my other friend comes over on Saturdays to do the ironing. In the first two weeks home, my three dear sister-in-laws and mother-in-law, took turns in cooking, mainly soups, as it was all I could stomach. I kept a small diary by my bedside so that there was no confusion as to when medication was due. Having played sport in the past, I was determined (within reason) to try and do as much as I could for myself. I felt terrible that these dear people were waiting on me, but had no choice,but to swallow my pride. I have my first post-op x-ray and appt with my surgeon next week, hopefully all is well and I will have some restrictions lifted. If you have friends and family wanting to assist you, that would be great for you, especially as the first couple of weeks can be very exhausting.

[Singer]

Most hospitals make the decision about whether or not you will go to rehab based on the recommendation of your physical therapists after surgery. I could never have gone straight home after surgery -- I was much too weak and dependent, and my husband could not have handled me. I went to rehab for 10 days and had a really good experience there. My surgery was two hours away from home but I chose a rehab close to my home, and the hospital arranged an ambulance ride to take me there. I think it's important to arrange for this and let your surgeon's people know BEFORE your surgery -- just in case they DO want to send you to rehab.

[rainbow2010]

The biggest thing you will need help with the first couple of weeks is showering. You need to have a chair VERY close by and someone there as you might get dizzy quickly. Most of the time you will be sleeping. Have your house stocked with all of your comfort foods. When I had my second surgery, I had a husband and 2 teenagers in the house. I made up and froze a couple of weeks worth of my favorite meals to have. They just had to heat them up for me. If you freeze individual portions you can zap them in the microwave when you feel like eating. It will probably take you a month before you feel like cleaning your house, so if you can get someone to help with that.

[lumbar3491]

First, I want to thank you all so much for responding. Your comments have really helped my planning process. The clear messages I'm getting from most of you re your first week or two home:

- Avail yourself of your friends offers to help. I plan to meet with them and see if I can come up with a care schedule for during the day when I get home. My partner will be here all evenings and weekends and LOVES to cook so I'm all set with food. Vali, like you, I have a hard time accepting help from people as I've always been the caregiver. Guess I just need to swallow my pride.

Hospital stay may be longer than expected. Jennifer, was your hospital stay planned for 19 days? My surgeon told me that stay would be for 10 days (A/P lumbar surgery). I have a friend whose surgery was extended to two weeks because of a pre-existing heart condition. I don't have any pre-existing conditions, but it sounds like I shouldn't set a 10-day hospital stay in stone. Your message gives me hope that I could take care of myself when I get home.

- Rehab after surgery is a possibility and is determined by your PT person. Singer, when did you let the surgeons folks know about your choice of rehab? At your pre-op testing session? When you were in the hospital? Who contacted your insurance company - you or the hospital? Many thanks.

- Not a bad idea to sleep in a separate place from your partner. Leslie and Sheri, you helped me make the decision to sleep in a separate from from my partner. I toss and turn under normal circumstances and know I will be a real pain to sleep with post-surgery. Did either of you rent a hospital bed? If so, when did you do this? I'm thinking of renting one as our bed is the only really good one here.

Again, thank you all and best of luck in your recovery. I'll stay tuned in.

Karen

[Singer]

Karen, before my surgery I called the rehab to make sure they accepted my insurance. Then I told my surgeon's people about my choice of rehab repeatedly -- at pre-op testing, before my surgery, and after my surgery, just to be sure. Never assume that the nurses, docs, and PTs talk to each other -- they very often do NOT because they're just too busy.

Once it was determined that I would go to rehab, the hospital folks made the arrangements for my stay and for my 2-hour ambulance ride there (which wasn't bad at all -- I was drugged to the gills and pretty much slept through it).

[johnsonbunch]

(Should I) rent a hospital bed?
Karen

I asked the same question about hospital beds or a recliner, and heard that most people prefer a flat bed and lay either flat on their back or somewhat on their side propped with pillows.

[lumbar3491]

Hi Chris

Thanks for the rehab information. The steps you took give me a plan to follow. Next week I plan to get together with a neighbor/friend who just happens to be a social worker at a local hospital (not the one where I will have my surgery). She has offered to chat with me about the best rehab places near home "just in case I need one." There is so much to do pre-op isn't there!

Karen

[lumbar3491]

Hi Sandy

Like you, I just did a search about using hospital beds. They get some mixed (and often amusing) reviews so I guess I'll just have to make up my own mind. I do have a foam egg crate mattress cover, about 2" thick, which will come in handy. The 3-4" mattress topper may work even better. I notice that some folks found those useful.

Karen

[lapieper]

Karen,

I have a great guest room bed, so didn't need a hospital bed. Didn't even think of it, to be honest. We have a real firm mattress in that room, so I slept "good." I got up frequently for the first two months, so there was no way I was going to deprive my husband of a good night's sleep. He deserved, as he did everything for me: cooking, cleaning, helping me with EVERYTHING, and I do mean EVERYTHING, including bathroom personal hygiene, as necessary.... What a darling man.
Les