View Full Version : Boyfriends, Wardrobe, and Scoliosis

Cat Eyes
02-05-2009, 08:40 PM
So I have posted on here many times before, and If you have read my previous messages, then you would know that I have just gotten a bosten brace about a month or so ago now. It sux and hurts.
Well, now I have a new problem. I just got a boy friend about 2 weeks after I was in my brace full time. I was like OMG. I have liked this guy for almost 6 months now and he finally asked me out. I almost screamed yes. But I just accepted then went home and screamed in a pillow. Then I remmebered that I had the brace. I wanted to look sexy now that I had a boy friend, but that is almost impossible in a brace. When I went to school and he hugged me in the halls it wasn't that bad, becuase I was sure that he didn't feel my brace. But after we started hugging more, it seemed that it was becoming more noticeable that he could feel my brace, he hasn't said anyhthing yet. I wonder if he doesn't feel it, if he does and doesn;t mention it or if he just knows about the situation already. I don';t know what to think, and I want hi to hug me and not feel the dumb brace. ADVICE??
Also, please help me with what to wear to help me look better in front of him and when I'm around him, I don;t want to make it unnoticable with a big sweatshirt or tee shirt, but I want it to be unnoticale, any advice?

02-06-2009, 06:45 AM
Cat Eyes,

This advice comes from the mom of teenage daughters.....

You are focusing WAY too much on looking sexy! First of all, you are a teenager, so you shouldn't be trying to look sexy anyway. Besides, this boy chose you for WHO you are, not how sexy you dress. Were you dressed sexy when he asked you out? No. So, why try to change who you are and how you dress when he's already chosen you?

Mary Lou

02-06-2009, 07:13 AM
Cat Eyes,

Please read and memorize Mary Lou's answer. She is exactly right.

Quiz tomorrow. :D

Really, he apparently liked you the way you were dressing before with the brace. He probably couldn't pick your clothing out of a line up, old style or any new style. He likes YOU. If it were me, I wouldn't change a thing (if I liked him back that is).

Good luck.


02-06-2009, 02:14 PM
Wise words from wise Moms already!

Just wanted to toss in my .02 from the viewpoint of both a Mom and a former Boston Brace wearer ...

I agree this boy was attracted to who you ARE: Although "brace wearer" is part of who you are (right now), it isn't ALL of who you are. My guess is there are many things he finds special about you - and how you look is just one small part.

My interpretation of your comment about "sexy" clothes (mainly because you mentioned big sweatshirts/t-shirts) was simply trendy/stylish clothes that are tough to wear and disguise a brace.

If I had it to do all over again, I'd have not wasted one *second* on trying to disguise mine, but I vividly remember what you're feeling. I was SO envious of girls who just took wearing cute clothes for granted when it seemed I wrestled in frustration with what to wear every single day.

Oh ... and IF you meant "sexy" in a seductive kind of way, I'm with Mary Lou that's not something you should be focusing on right now - LOL. Better watch the hugging in the halls, too ... don't add a PDA writeup to your worries!

If he's hugged you, he surely knows you wear the brace: Even a person in fantabulous shape can't have muscles *that* hard ;-). There are a multitude of possible reasons he hasn't mentioned it (maybe he even has a sister or a cousin who wears one, and it's no big deal). The only way you'll really know his thoughts on it is to talk to him about it - when you're comfortable enough, and if you just feel you need to.

My guess is he just doesn't *care* you wear a brace, hon.

Like Sharon said, it sounds like he was just fine with how you dressed before, so why stress yourself out trying to fix a problem that doesn't exist?

Also, along the lines of what Sharon said, boys are clueless when it comes to clothes. (and then they grow up to be fashion clueless men - laff ... get used to it, sister!)

Enjoy yourself, sweetie, and (as has been said) remember he chose to ask you out, AFTER you went into the brace. Don't sabotage your fun with worry about changing yourself, or what he'll think *now*, when he obviously likes you just the way you are. ;-)


02-06-2009, 03:41 PM
this is what you can wear I wear leggings, wear long shirts, i do that and if he asks what it is then tell him about your scoliosis:):):)

The Slice
02-09-2009, 08:11 AM
I too will add my 2 cents here. Sharon, Mary Lou, and Pam have hit the nail on the head as it were. It's not likely that he doesn't know about your brace. He likes you for what's on the inside (what's in your head and heart) and not what you look like. Relax and savour what you have. I know that it's awkward and uncomfortable to be dealing with something that makes you "different" when all you want to do is blend in. When you have friends that accept the situation, learn to relax and enjoy those friendships. When you can do that, and just be yourself, you'll find that more people will accept you for who you are, not what you are.

03-30-2009, 09:26 PM
Cat Eyes,

Be truthful and I think dancer4life is right, you should just tell him that its a brace big deal so be your self...