View Full Version : Anxiety, Anxious, Scared, Excited...Is it normal?

10-07-2008, 08:16 PM
Hello all,

It's Reggie again. Today was the first REAL bad day for me. I have about a week and a half to go. Everything I guess just hit me. I went through all the emotions as mentioned in the title of this post. I hate to sound like a big baby (not really) but I cried for the first time over this. I know I have one of the best Dr.s on the planet. I have a strong belief in God and the most supportive family and friends one person could have. BUT, I was just wondering if all these emotions are normal. I thank God that I found this forum and everyone's stories and the advise I have gotten. God Bless you all!!!!
Thanks again,

10-07-2008, 08:51 PM

In a word - YES! These are such normal things to feel, especially with such a short time to go! And no, it definitely doesn't make you a "baby". This is serious stuff, but you sound confident that you're doing the right thing, with the right doctor. And that's about the best a person can do. Soon you will be through all this crazy lead-up head-stuff, & into the recovery phase, feeling better every day. :)

I'm sure that every one of us here have been through the entire gamet of crazy emotions in the lead up to surgery, but we've all survived it! If it's any consolation to you, I'm still 9 weeks pre-op (for this revision), & feeling everything from spectacularly petrified to very excited to surprisingly calm. For my own peace of mind, I'm working hard to control the things I can to help along a positive outcome - getting myself as fit/healthy/strong as I can, trying to keep as calm as possible, & soliciting some wonderful support here at the forum. I guess control what you can, & what you can't - leave up to your faith.

Please post lots, let us know how you're doing, & bombard us with as many questions as you need to. You'll be recovering & looking forward to getting on with life in no time. :)

Take good care of yourself.

Ginger W.
10-08-2008, 12:23 AM
If this was the first time you cried, then you've been holding it together far too long! A good long cry can release stored-up tension and be down-right good for you.

Most of us had some pretty teary times as the date crept up on us. Luckily, the lead-up ENDS and you'll be moving onto recovery SOON!

Best Wishes,

10-08-2008, 05:28 AM
You describe exactly how I feel, with one week to go. I am very impressed that this is the first time you cried. Jeez, I've been crying off and on for months. Only within the last few weeks I'm getting a tiny bit excited. Remind me when your date is?

Hey--at least you don't have lice in your house right now, correct? See, you're better off than me :)

10-08-2008, 08:39 AM
Ginger-Yes I have held everything in for way too long. It has been easier for me to just get lost in my work. I was running from this. I realized that last night after a lot of thinking. I had a talk with the wife and she did the best thing ever, (as always) she just listened to me. I can't imagine what she is going through. Anyway, I am trying to face my fears now. I am getting very excited, I guess this is just the roller coaster ride I've been on and will continue to ride on until the 20th.

Debbe- My surgery is scheduled for Oct. 20th. I am also getting excited. As I told Ginger, its just the roller coaster ride that I am on. I hope you can get rid of the lice. My 8 year old had a real bad summer with it. As soon as we got rid of it, she would get it again. We finally narrowed down where she was getting it from and finally got rid of it. My wife suggests LICEMD, it worked the best. Please post when you can with updates after your surgery. Best of luck! We will keep all of you in our prayers.

I or Laura, my wife, will post updates after the surgery.
Talk to you all soon. Thanks again!

loves to skate
10-08-2008, 11:46 AM
Hi Reggie,
Yup, it's all normal. I don't remember crying much but I had a lot of that panicky feeling in the pit of my stomach in the last two or three weeks. I found a relaxation tape at the hospital the day I had my pretesting and it really helped a lot. I listened to it twice a day lying down in my bedroom by myself. It was a Relaxation/Healing CD by Peggy Huddleston. The website is www.healfaster.com. Maybe it will help you and any others preparing for surgery. My best to you. Sally

10-08-2008, 12:52 PM
Don't worry we've all been there!
Heck I was at that time before the surgery and when I really hit the lows my internal medicine doctor said "It's about time we put you on Xanax girl!" No joke!! I have to say that helped me function the last week prior, to have a GREAT time with my husband and kids on vacation (a vacation I feared would be the last with my babies hey I'm a pessimist) and that doesn't mean I still didn't cry...oh I cried like a BABY!!...but here I am 4 and a half months post OP!!! Straighter than ever before! and happier with my decision even more every day I get stronger and stronger!!
and YES I still do cry, but for other reasons now ;)
You will do GREAT!

10-08-2008, 07:31 PM
Hi Reggie,
I am over the 2 year post-op mark and looking back I can tell you I had the same feelings. I never thought I would have a so called panic attack but I did by the weekend before my surgery. I felt like I coud'nt breath.
What you said about it all being a roller coaster ride is so true. There are many ups & downs & highs & lows thru this. You will come out of this a stronger, better person in the end...I did!!!
Hang on & ride the highs & lows and I will say many prayers for you!
Best to you for a most successful surgery-Lynne:)

fused T11 to L5 Aug 2006 Dr Boachie/Kim at HSS in NYC
at 46 yrs old/ original lower curve of 95/reduce to 60

10-08-2008, 07:40 PM
Reggie-- everyone is saying it because it is sooo true-- almost everyone goes through the same roller coaster ride. The only one I remember who was just excited and not really anxious was Geish.

Soon you'll be on the other side with all us post-ops. Ahead of time there are so many thoughts that trample all over your brain... all the second guessing, concerns, freaking out, etc., and at the same time wondering what it will REALLY be like afterward. The recovery, your body, the pain, what you'll be like down the road in a couple of years... We are all different, and it's just impossible to know what it will be like. I have a feeling you'll do just great-- and soon you'll be on the healing end of the surgery rather than the anxious one. Hang in there! :) Susie

10-10-2008, 07:14 PM
I wrote about the rough day, I guess its ok to write about the good day. I felt really upbeat about the surgery! (10 days away) I went and bought the "spine kit" today and got even more excited. I only have to work 4 days next week due to the fact that I have to get the central line placed on Friday and meet with anesthesia also. I really can't wait now. Thanks to EVERYONE for your support. I hope I may return the favor to you all and others that may be in need later on. This is a great forum.
God Bless and be safe.

10-10-2008, 07:42 PM
Good luck on the upcoming surgery. I hope you have a successful surgery and recovery. ..............Stephanie

10-13-2008, 09:05 PM
Here is my pics of my x-rays from my pre-op. Can't wait to post the new pics after surgery! 1 week away. Yepeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks again to everyone for your support and advice.


10-15-2008, 07:16 AM
god bless!

10-15-2008, 04:56 PM
Thinking of you, Reggie - all the best for the surgery & recovery.

You're almost making me excited about my op, lol!

10-17-2008, 10:35 PM
I went to Barnes Hosp. taday and the Central Line was placed. I followed that up with a visit with anesthesia and pre-op planning. All went well! Now I am ready and all pumped up! I can't wait to start the recovery process. I just imagine in a couple of days, I will have my new back and a new beginning on life with my beatiful wife and wonderful daughter. Boy I just can't wait. Sorry to ramble on, but I am really excited about this. Thanks again to everyone that has offered advice, prayers, and support. I mean this from the bottom of my heart. (this is also for those of my friends that read the forum but don't post) Thanks for listening :)


10-18-2008, 01:21 AM
Good luck Reggie. It's great that you're so excited about your surgery now that it's so close. You're very brave. I wish you a rapid and smooth recovery and look forward to your updates.


10-18-2008, 02:00 AM
Reggie, it's so great to hear you excited! You'll be in recovery mode in no time now & I'm glad you've got your wonderful wife & daughter to support you through it.

Best of luck to you, take care :)

10-18-2008, 09:16 AM
Reggie- I'm so excited for you! It's a giant step when you get to the point where you are feeling both excited and ready! We will be looking forward to that post saying all is well and you are on the "other side" of this surgery. I know I've said it before, but it's kind of like the excited anticipation before Christmas... Your "house" of a spine is about to have the ultimate remodeling job... and that is so super! I'm praying for you-- for a successful surgery and relatively quick recovery. Take care! :) Susie

loves to skate
10-18-2008, 02:40 PM
Hi Reggie,

Ditto to what Susie said. I know you are in good hands at Barnes. They saved my Brother's life several years ago and I know they have an excellent reputation. I'll be praying for you and your family. Sally

10-18-2008, 09:14 PM

Best of luck with your surgery...I am glad your excited about it. I have never regretted the surgery and yes it was a long slow recovery for me but I am still happy I had it done.

Best Wishes,