Surgery date

[gillespie]

Well we have finally received my daughters surgery date November 24th 2008.
I thought I would be relieved to know when but now I am really scared and worried. I will ride the waves of emotion and know she will be ok. I am sure you all will be hearing from me more over the next couple of months.

[WNCmom]

I know how you feel. I think I'm becoming more settled with it, but every time we move a step closer there's another wave--of fear or emotion. I'm sure it's a process we'll be going through again and again.

So many others have been through it--I'm sure we'll get through, too.

Mary Ellen

[Kitty]

Hi Catherine,

Glad you have your date. Ours is November 18. It's getting closer and closer, and i am nervous too but in some respects i can't wait - mainly for it to be over and done with (the waiting is the hard part) but also because I'm excited my daughter will have a much straighter spine and so i like to think about that. She doesn't seem to be too concerned at the moment and i tend to hide my feelings from her as she doesn't need to take on my fears. But i know she'll be okay. Catherine, do you have support around you - family at home.

Lisa

[gillespie]

I have alot of support. I have a wonderful family and great friends. I am slowly learning that there are times when you just need to let people be there for you. I guess its just a personality fault that I don't like to lean on others but I am learning to get over that. I hope. I find this group to be a very good outlet and I can let my protective shield down.

[Kayle]

Hi,
I am 15 years old and I am about 2 1/2 months post surgery. I had the lower 1/2 of my back fused together. I know as a kid I can't help with how you're feeling of being nervous and scared as a mom. But I do have a few suggestions about post surgery.
After her surgery make sure nothing is out of reach that she uses on a regular basis because to me it makes me very tempted to bend down and get it myself which causes a lot of unwanted pain. Even a couple months out it is still painful. That is one of the biggest things I noticed when I got home from the hospital.
Also remember that she will be okay. The first week is the absolute worst, but after that it gets better every day. I know it must be hard to not be able to help her as much as you would like to, but just being there for her does wonders.
I hope everything turns out well for her and your family, I am sure it will.

[rushtonfamily]

I will be praying for you to find peace with all of this. May God watch over you!

[Kitty]

Thank you Kayle and Ruston Family

Kayle your comments were veryhelpful and gives me something to think about. I will keep that in mind when Tahlia comes back from the hospital.

I am glad you are feeling better and wish you the best with a speedy recovery.

(my daughter is 15 also!)

Thanks agian,
LIsa

[Kayle]

Thank you I wish her a speedy recovery too. It will go great. It seems like a good age to do it at

[ARN010]

Surgery Date and Fear

Just letting you know that I received our surgery date a few weeks prior. I am so grateful for that as I was an absolute basket case; however, there was so much to do (MRI, x-rays, blood work, contact Red Cross, etc.) that I am grateful I did not have 9 mos. to obsess on it. I woke up shaky and had to go on Xanax for awhile. I would cry at my desk at work....it was rough. I had to do quite an internal job of letting go of my child...I had questions like "did I make the right decision for her life?" then there were the "what if's"...it was rough. Ultimately, I trusted the surgeon and my 2nd opinion. I got a lot of conflicting messages from this forum and had to research the medical journals and talk to others in person who had had the surgery. We were lucky that Amanda had a "brace/fusion sponsor" a 20 year old who had the surgery 5 years earlier. She helped Amanda when she adjusted to the brace at 6 years old and we kept in touch some so that when surgery was looming she graciously spoke with and then came to visit Amanda. We left them alone in the hospital room for awhile so they could talk as only two spinal fusion patients can to each other coming from the same experience. That was a real blessing. The visible hump forming helped my decision as well. Girls are prone to a dip in self esteem around the time of Jr. High; I was very concerned about this as she started to care about how she looked more and more. At 6 years old the brace was uncomfortable but it wasn't hooked into self esteem yet. This forum did help to give me an anonymous place to voice my fears and so many of you told me I would make it through this -- I just believed even in the darkest post-op moments. Hang in there. Call me if you need to, I gave you my number and we have e-mailed offline recently. Your process will be yours personal to you...it will change you probably permanently. Once nice side effect of this for me (or really for my daughter) has been I don't baby her quite as much. She actually walked home from school for the first time this month....having faced my deepest fear it has freed me up from some of my other fears...for example this summer I did the Drop Zone (a 30-story free fall thrill ride)....I NEVER would have done that before; I may be crazy but I was so proud of myself for letting go and in the end it was very fun....okay gotta get dressed for work. Hang in there!!