Ow

[Qikdraw]

I'm in pain. The spring on my garage door broke, and in trying to figure out what was wrong with it I took it off the screw (pulled the cord), the door promptly fell on my dog. (she's ok) I of course rushed to lift the door off her, and because the spring had sprung I had to lift the entire weight of the door. (which is heavy) I am in pain. A lot of pain. (More than normal. )

Worse is my mother in law is wanting painting done asap. This morning she took down more things in the kitchen so those walls can be painted. I can barely walk let alone paint anything. Its not going to be a fun day. I'm not going to be painting till I don't hurt, but my mother in law makes her displeasure known very quickly.

I am living in a house co-owned by my wife and her mother. My wife & I cannot leave because no one else in her family will help take care of their mother, so we are stuck here, and I am stuck in a house with a person who has never liked me, and always finds somethng to disprove of. It ain't easy. It ain't fun.

Sorry to vent, just needed to.

[Gerry]

No need to be sorry

We all need to vent once in awhile. No need to be sorry. I can understand how you feel. MILs can be a pain in the *. Feel free to give her a boot in the * for me, OK?

[Susie*Bee]

Poor baby... (and I mean that!)

Yes, vent away, Brad! It sounds like a difficult situation! Sorry about the garage door accident-- and I'm sure glad your dog is ok. Which one was it? And too bad about the paint project. Doesn't she understand anything? Dumb MILs-- oh yeah, I am one of those creatures, twice over. Be nice now!

[Gerry]

I am wondering if you are doing any better today, Brad, or are you in more pain than ever? Let us know.

[Qikdraw]

Thanks girls,

No I'm not doing any better yet. Right now I'm sitting up for about 30-40 minutes, and then going and laying down. I'm hoping its a temperary thing. My wife is going to give me a massage tonight, which I really enjoy, so maybe that will help. If I had a swimming pool I think I would have spent the day in there.

Susie,

The dog was Angel, the springer spaniel. We had just came back from the vets too. She is ok, she was yelping when the door was on her, but then so would I. No bruising on her or anything, she was happy as a clam a few minutes later. (why are clams happy???)

Brad

[loves to skate]

Hi Brad,

Some mother-in-law's can really be a pain. Mine was. She always came around when she wanted something, never mind what was going on with us at the time. I put my foot down when she wanted to move in with us. Keep your xrays posted where she can see them and tell her to stop whining. Your before is the worst I have seen on this forum. I hope your wife sticks up for you. I think she needs to be firm with her mother. I hope you feel better soon. Sally

[Singer]

My in-laws lived with us for two long years. We had no idea what we were getting into and regretted it just weeks after the two of them moved in. The best part about my surgery was the fact that it gave us a reason to move them out into their own apartment.

[debbei]

Brad,

I'm sorry about the garage door incident. You poor guy. Your mother-in-law needs a kick in the butt. Tell her to go hire a painter

Take care of yourself, and I hope you get some relief.

[Qikdraw]

Thank you all for your replies. I am a bit better today, but we'll see how the day goes, I'm just going to take it very easy.

I am going to suggest she hire a painter, there is only 3 walls left to do, but doing two of them requires heavy moving, things I will just not do now. I could have done it piecemeal before, but not now. She'll get mad, but I'm not really caring right now.

Brad

[Qikdraw]

*Update*

Well I am doing better now, not completely better, but at lest I can sit at the computer for awhile now. I'm still moving stiffly, but at least it is going away.

Oh yeah, the suggestion to hire a painter? Bad idea, she flipped out on that one. So my mil painted the walls and did a really bad job. She painted around things. She would start an area, leave it for a few hours, then come back and finish up. Now you can see exactly where she left off before. Its horrible. But I'm being calm about it. I've taken my hands off and am not doing a thing, not only because of my back, but because of the incredibly mean things she said to my wife, who spent a lot of time crying. To say I am pissed off about that would be an understatement.

But hey, my back is getting better.

Brad

[Wishing]

Dear Brad,

I'm glad your back is slowly feeling better. I found Thermawraps to be a big help when my back got sore. They are good for about 8 hours. Have you tried those? I like the suggestion of having your X-rays framed, very large ones, and post them in a conspicuous place for your MIL's benefit. I also found in life that when I set limits and boundaries with people, the more I was respected and my wishes were regarded. It sounds like there is no pleasing this lady as she is unhappy in herself, so you must do what is reasonable to maintain your health, physical and mental. You need to take good care of your back as it has to last a lifetime. I would suggest counselling for you and your wife to review your living situation. You are still a young couple and it sounds as though you live under too much stress and that can take a big toll on a relationship as well as one's health over time.
Looking at that high curve in your before pictures, it looks as though it may have severely affected your airway and breathing. How is your breathing now?
I was initially referred to Dr. Bradford for my revision. He has now retired from surgery and is still on staff part-time at U.C.S.F. I had my revision by Dr.Lenke in St.Louis, last June. I also presented some challenges and was not an easy case. Doing well in recovery.
Take good care of yourself. You're not superman. Good luck. Rita

[Qikdraw]

Thanks Rita,

I haven't heard of thermawraps, but I'll look them up and see if they'll work for me. My problem is this is not a muscle pain, but a pinching of nerves. My discs below my rods have deteriorated and I constantly feel bone on bone when I move around. While that is not painful the pinched nerves are. I think lifting up the garage door just caused a further pinching, which is slowly getting better.

My mil is the irristable force AND the immovable object. lol Our 7 years of marriage have been in this situation and while it has been hard, we are still together and strong. In a lot of ways it is what has made our relationship as strong as it is. We are looking at ways to get out of here, but we won't do it and leave her mother hanging, thats not right.

My breathing is ok. I've never been able to run very long at all, and by the time I had my surgery I had problems breathing regularily. Its why they rushed my surgery before puberty. I was curving over more and more rapidly. My life expectancy, if I did not have the surgery, was around 20 years old. I'm ok now, although I am extremely sensitive to chemicals in the air. Common cleaning chemicals in the air will do me for a loop very quickly.

I sent a letter to Dr Bradford recently, I'm hoping to be able to see him again. Today is the 25th anniversary of my second operation, and the one where they put the rods in, so I am hoping he'd be interested in doing a 25 year checkup. lol

Brad

[Wishing]

Dear Brad,

Thermawraps can be found in any drug store. Sorry to hear about your disc problems. Bone on bone does not sound good. It sounds as though you need to be followed by a very experienced scoliosis surgeon. I was originally referred to Dr. Bradford for my revision and wrote to him. I was informed by his office staff that he was not seeing patients anymore but was doing research part-time at U.C.S.F. From his office, I was referred to Dr.Vedat Deverin also at U.C.S.F. and was seen by him. Dr. Bradford was to come over to the clinic and see me during my visit there, but that did not work out. Dr. Deverin did not wish to do surgery on me due to my low lung volume. I was also referred to Dr. Lenke or Dr. Boachie. I recently had my revision my Dr. Lenke and am now recovering. Good luck to you in your follow-up care.
It sounds as though your wife and you are in agreement about a life plan for your living situation. I wish to relate a story from which I learned a lot about life. I was raised by an aunt who was very good to me but who was also very difficult to please. I could not do anything right no matter what I did to please her. I learned at around age 20 that part of her condition of raising me was that I live with her forever as she had never married and wanted company. When I wanted to go away to college, she wanted to go with me. She feigned a heart attack and threatened to report me to the parish priest for my ingratitude. I beat her to the draw and went myself to talk to the priest about my situation and for advice. He told me to go ahead with my plans and wished me the best. I forced a separation. There were some unhappy times briefly, but my aunt then met a lady who was a recent widow and needed a live-in lady companion. The two became friends and housemates and had lots of other retired friends. My aunt even got a marriage proposal at age 67 but would have none of that. We wrote to each other and I visited her from college. Life was better for both of us. So, the story had a happy ending.
I do wish you the best in your endeavors and enjoy your contributions to the forum. Rita

[green m&m]

oh no, poor dog! glad to know she's ok

[theizzard]

glad to know your dog is ok. can't stand mother-in-laws. they suck.
avis