7 months post-op

[Singer]

Hi all -- I am now 7 months post-op and -- to be honest -- I'm still having a bit of a rough time. I am disappointed that I still have the level of pain that I do. What I find most difficult of all is finding the balance between staying active and overdoing it. I have to walk or work out every day to keep my weak leg as strong as possible, and while it feels pretty good while I'm doing it, my torso and my lower back are always very sore. By 5 p.m. I'm walking like the Tin Man!

I'm also having a tough time getting off the last of the Percocet -- and I'm taking such a little dose of it every 6-7 hours, it's like spitting in the ocean - but it does take the edge off. I'm amazed at the people who are able to do without pain killers 3 or 4 months after surgery.

Anyway, thanks for listening to me whine about this -- just feeling quite discouraged at the moment.

[Karen Ocker]

Chris:

It takes a LOOONG time. I was off narcotic at 3 months but was on neurontin(Gabapentin) along with Aleve, for the next 3. It seemed like forever. Nobody over 50 can be off all pain meds and function. I was not really pain free of a year and half post-op.

It seems Chris, you think something is wrong with you. By my own experience, YOUR experience is similar to mine.

Just allow yourself to heal one day at a time.

[trulyaries]

Chris -
I'm 8.5 months post-op, still taking prescription NSAIDs and Gabapentin. In fact, I have been on NSAIDS or painkillers of one kind or another since before my first surgery in 2000. Although I don't think it's as severe as the problem you had, I have some weakness in one leg. I'm heading into my fourth surgery next month because of continuing problems with nerve pain and bending over.

The one difference between us? You walk like the Tinman, I walk like the Hunchback of Notre Dame!! Just wanted you to know that you have company - and that I too have my moments of being discouraged and whining - yes, lots of whining!

[Singer]

Thank you both.

Trulyaries, I consider my recovery a walk in the park compared to your situation.

I appreciate the discussion of meds, because sometimes I feel like the general feeling on the Forum is to get off the meds as soon as possible because you'll feel so much better if you do. Well, I can't function without the tiny dose of Percocet I take.

I can't wait for spring, because my muscles are so much more relaxed when the weather is warm!!!

[trulyaries]

I can't wait for spring, because my muscles are so much more relaxed when the weather is warm!!!

Ditto, ditto, and more ditto!!

[Linda W]

Walking like Lurch

Chris,

I'm also walking the line between staying active and overdoing. My back feels like a lobster claw or bear claw clenching by late afternoon most days. I too think I should be beyond this level of discomfort. At my 6-month checkup last week, Dr. Rand told me I was totally "on target" in recovery for someone in "my age group". I would seriously like to change my age group.

He signed a release for me to start a PT program other than just walking. He told me to make "quality of life" my first priority and exercise secondary. I took that information in and then my Type A personality took over, and I walked farther and more quickly than I should have two days in a row -- probably because it is so darn cold here in New England. Then I was not careful while putting a pan of Brownies in the oven for my 12 year old son's Patriots Party on Sunday. Now, I am walking around like Lurch. I'd say you, TrulyAries and I should have no problem coming up with an idea for our Halloween costumes in the fall. My new matra is "quality of life, quality of life". It sounds like a good one for many of us!

Go Patriots!
Linda W.

[trulyaries]

Now, I am walking around like Lurch. I'd say you, TrulyAries and I should have no problem coming up with an idea for our Halloween costumes in the fall.
Linda W.

Thanks, Linda - LOL! Since I'm having surgery again in 3 weeks, I hope to change my costume to the Statue of Liberty. If my surgery is successful it will be very appropriate. If not, I can go on the attack with my torch!

[Singer]

Linda -- a bear claw clenching -- that's it exactly! Or, as I complain to my husband, I feel like I'm in one of those medieval vises with with screws that slowly tighten around my torso as the day wears on.

I don't know about you, but I feel it's a bit too soon to be chasing "quality of life" issues. For me right now, it's all about trying to heal without mishap. I'll be thinking more about "quality of life" when I can tie my own #@#$* shoelaces, thank you very much!!!!!!!

(Not ranting at you Linda, just letting off steam )

[Linda W]

The Little Engines that Could

Chris,

This is the correct place to let off steam! Some days I am also tired of acting like the "Little Engine" and wish I had a recovery GPS to get to the other side of the mountain. I had to take 2 mg of Dilaudid last night because of my over achieving personality and poor judgement -- something I have not had to do since the first of December.

I have given up on the goal of ever being able to tie my sneakers. I have those curly-que stretchy laces in all my sneakers. If I grab the sneaker tongue firmly with the grabber and pull up, I can usually get them on without having to use a shoe horn in the other hand. Talk about multi-tasking. I manage the low cut sneaker socks pretty effectively but find that trouser socks are my current nemesis. If I am able to get my toes in them and scuff around on the carpet to advance them, I find myself looking for another human to help me pull them up. It is quite a vision of loveliness if you can visualize it. I can't wait for Spring so I can go without socks. I have an event in June that will require wearing a dress and hose. I guess I should start practicing now to get the blasted panty hose on without putting my fist through them.

My personal interpretation of "quality of life" is functioning as best I can without putting my pain level at risk. I have a 40 year old friend who had her fusion surgery a month earlier than mine. She drove at three weeks and went skiing this weekend! Talk about disparity in our own healing times! My husband keeps reminding me that she is almost 20 years younger than me.

I am certain that our surgeons are saying that we, "Little Engines", are on track for our "age group". Hang in there and let off your steam here whenever you need to just like the rest of us.

Linda W.

[Geish]

Do you have a "sock putter-on-er"? I was given a great one, but it can be ordered from www.sammomnspreston.com and is item # E2087. It runs $18.35 and can even be used with pantyhose. I really like this one because it collapses small enough not to stretch out women's socks. I don't have any answers for tying shoelaces, but I hope the sock putter on er can be as helpful to you as it is to me. Good luck.
Alicia

[lelc2002@yahoo]

it's a long recovery!

Chris---Looking back at my recovery, I felt it was very difficult at about 6 mos. I was probably the most down then believe it or not. I thought I would be back to my normal self by then & that set me up for some dissappointment. By 6 months you are thankful you can do much more but still you want to do all you did before & you just can't. It is very frustrating! It does build your patience as you go on though!
Realize how far you have come! It is a long road but gets better every month!
Lynne
48 yrs old this mth!!

[Susie*Bee]

But...

Don't we all wonder "how long will this take?"!!!! At 8.5 months now, I am feeling and doing so much better, but I still can't do what I'd like to be able to do. Sometimes it is just plain discouraging. Yesterday by the end of the day I was feeling hunched over, achy--including some new aches I haven't had yet-- in the muscles (and also occasional sharp pains) in my shoulder/scapula area, and my neck was bothering me too,and felt more than a little disheartened... I know I am doing so much better, but really, how long does it take until we are "all the way better"???? I know that is a rhetorical question and we are all different.

I also realize full well that I had 4 days of doing more than normal, which contributed to my condition. But life is full of "doing more" days--or should be. All I did was normal stuff during the day on Saturday, (and let me just mention on the side that I made an apple crisp for a church dinner and somehow blew my thumb out while peeling apples, so that I was unable to bring it around to grasp anything...) then went to a wedding and reception that afternoon/evening, a full day of church related things on Sunday followed by a two hour trip to my daughter's, where we spent the night. Went on a side-trip to buy my Total Gym exercise thing so I can work on squats (who'd have ever thought I'd be buying something like that or even doing all this exercise stuff!), hung out at my daughter's the rest of the day, not doing much of anything, then the trip home... Yesterday was just a long shopping day--grocery store, Wal-Mart, etc., then back home. We live about 45 minutes from the "shops"... Every time we go I wonder when I'll ever be able to do it by myself again. I can't fathom carrying grocery bags and getting them in the van--or taking them back out at home. I know I could take a reacher with me to the grocery store to get things from lower shelves, but.... (!) there's all the rest to contend with. Last time we went shopping and I tried getting a can from a lower shelf, doing a fast, awkward little half squat, I knocked a can off. I knew I couldn't get all the way to the floor to pick it up, so I just moved it with my foot so it would be out of the way. I know the other people in the aisle probably thought I was really rude and lazy. I WISHED I had my cane with me, but I never use it anymore. I didn't know whether to say something like "I'm sorry, but I can't bend down to get that." As it was, I just walked on...

I'm sorry this is so long, but I guess I am venting too. I feel good about how far I've come, but I don't know if there will actually be a time when I feel "finished" with recovery. I think I am just feeling discouraged at the moment. By the way, my thumb is getting a little better, but not back to normal yet. At least I can hit the space key on the keyboard with it now, which I couldn't before, and can also hold a glass again, but with a little pain still. Thanks for letting me blow off steam a little.

[Singer]

I remember that about you, Lynne...

And Susie,

I know other people have told me it takes a year or 18 months to feel normal again.

BUT -- what I suspect is, the tough part for me is realizing that I will probably need to make peace with some PERMANENT changes in how I live my life -- for instance, I don't see what I will ever again be charging around the back yard with a wheelbarrow full of mulch, or shoveling snow off the driveway. Of course, I could no longer do that in the last couple of years before my surgery anyway.

It's funny you mentioned the supermarket, because that's where I feel my limitations very keenly also. I still can't really squat because of my weak leg, and when the cart starts to get heavy I get an almost panicky feeling and rush to the checkout line, very anxious to get home.

On the OTHER hand -- (are you getting whiplash following this?) -- the reality is, I would have become increasingly disabled had I NOT had the surgery. A fused spine is not natural, and it is limiting. But so is severe scoliosis. The hardest part about this condition, for me, is ACCEPTING the fact that EITHER WAY, with or without a fused spine, my back will never be "normal."

I guess I always thought I'd be facing these kinds of issues in my 70s -- not my 50s!!!

[CHRIS WBS]

Ladies,

Reading your posts concerns me a great deal. As a single self-supporting female, I cannot afford to be off from work for months and months recuperating from major back surgery. I will have to go on short-term disability followed by long-term disability which will pay me 60% of my salary. If this stretches out to a year or more of not being able to work, this will present a real financial hardship for me. How can you work if you’re in pain or doped up on pain medication? I would not be able to concentrate. I can tell you that when I went to the last support group meeting, the women who were there who had surgeries in their 50s spoke about a two to three-year recovery period. None of them worked though. They were either retired or they did not have to work. Are there any other women in my position and how have you managed?

Chris

[Singer]

Chris, you will no doubt get some reassuring replies but first let me tell you that even with the limitations and discomfort I still have, if I had to go back to work in an office I have no doubt that I COULD. I am not in agony, and I am not doped up (not anymore, anyway ). I am extremely fortunate that I don't have to work, but I think the people who have the most problems with working post-op are those who have very physical jobs, like sales reps or restaurant workers.

I have even started singing again (little church gigs) and I'm doing okay. My point is, despite my whining and carrying on, I'm pretty active. It's all relative.