how long do you need care for after surgery?

[fitiani33]

Hi, my name is Stephanie. I wrote a couple weeks ago. I am new here and decided to have the surgery. So far my Dr. and i agreed on June 5th and i am just waiting on confirmation. So far all i know he belives it will just be anterior, removing 2 ribs, no incsion on hip for bone graph, he is just gonna use the removed ribs, and hopefully bring the slightly over 40 curve back down to around 20. ( lumbar ) My question is, my mother is taking time off of work to help me out and i don't know how much time i am gonna need her for. I know everyone recovers differently, but on average what can i expect? Would you say i would need her defintly 1,2,3 weeks? i have no clue?I also have a 3yr. old son. This should be fun! She has about 6 weeks to spare but we are trying to figure out if she has to use them all at once or if maybe i might be able to do 2 weeks and let her go back to work for a week and then come back or something? Would this be possibile? Any info would be great. Thanks!

[LindaRacine]

Hi Stephanie...

Do you have a lot of pain? A curve of about 40 degrees is really marginal in terms of surgery. With a 3 year old child, if you don't have pain, you may want to wait 5 or 10 years. However, if you have a lot of pain, that's definitely a reason to have surgery sooner rather than later.

Regards,
Linda

[sweetness514]

Hi Stephanie,

I agree with what Linda said as far as getting surgery now, unless you're in pain.

But as far as needing someone after recovery, it differs but the first month is the hardest, and after you can get adjusted to your new way of doing things by yourself, after you get more energy back, and so long as you can call someone in need of emergency.

[fitiani33]

Pain

I have been dealing with pain for the past 10 years or so. When i was 16 i went to the dr. because my back hurt so bad and a different dr. wanted to to a similar operation then but i said no. Ever since then my pain has gotten so much worse. There are times were i can't do like regular things anymore. The past 2 years have been the worst. I had mri's done because i thought for sure i had something else besides scoliosis wrong ( like herniated disc, bulging anything, broken things who knows all i know is i hurt ). To my surpirise, i was fine. Just the scoliosis. My ribs on the left side in the back are raised so much higher though it makes it easier to show someone where it hurts. You can push on it with all your might and i can barely feel it. I need it to be rubbed out EVERY SINGLE DAY. I'm talking my pain is bad. I married my husband because he used to give me the best massages and he said he would give me a massage every day as long as he lived. And let me tell you. I neeeeeeeed them. People might have more severe curves but for some reason, this 40 is kicking my &%*. I don't know if the degree has anythin to do with the pain, but mine is off the charts.(my pain) Sometimes i can't even fall asleep at night from the pain and i just wanna cry from how frustrating it is just tossing and turning.In short, i for sure have pain.

[crookedspine]

Stephanie, if you and your doctor have agreed that it is time for you to have surgery, then go for it if you trust your surgeon like I did. I waited a long time (I was 48 & have had scoliosis pain for most of those years), but don't recommend it.

As far as needing someone, I agree the first month is the hardest, and if I had had a 3-year-old, I would have had my mom here that whole month. As it was, I had my husband and 16-year-old daughter (and my mom during the day) to help me. The trick is to not stress yourself in any way, if possible. After about 3 weeks, reassess your situation if that is a possibility. Hope this helps. Linda

[Suzy]

Hi Stephanie. Wow..........I know what you mean about the pain changing your life, that is when its time to do something about it. It's been 5 weeks since my surgery. As for your needing help it will depend on how you recover. As everyone says on here we are all different. Is your son in a daycare of some sort your mom can get him to so you can rest? Can she prepare meals for you? Are you in good shape yourself so you can bounce back faster? Some of the pain meds I have make it impossable to try to be a parent. (Valium, even 1/2 a 5 mg pill!) My husband is fully in charge. I was able to drive at 3 1/2 weeks post op as long as I stayed off the valium. Then it was only for a 1/2 hr outing. Then I needed a 2 hr. nap! I can now do a few errands at a time. I would say she will need to move in for a couple of weeks for sure. I had a 49*lumbar curve reduced to 10* and I am 43. My 16 and 10 yr. olds were a huge help. You will need your mom for a bit for sure. As great as I was in shape before this it did knock me for a loop. It is tough. Being straight (and going to look in the mirror)helps me cope when the pain is worse then other times. I would NOT reccomend anyone in pain to wait to get this surgery. Being young and in shape doesn't last forever....Questions? E-mail me at suzy907@hotmail.com

[lelc2002@yahoo]

hey suzy,
happy you are back posting!!!! good luck on recovery!

To stephanie,
I have not had surgery yet. I have 7 & 10 yr old boys & I still worry about my husband handling the boys & house & me! It seems the first 2 months are the rough ones where you are really out of commission(very tired etc..) Besides your mom, I would seek out friends with kids his age for playdates where he can go over their house(who you feel comfortable with. ) Maybe camp/preschool 2-4hrs & your mom could take him over & then she could do for you what you need..around the house etc. He is so young but if he is ok with others then I would do it. My kids are much older but still have a lot of NEEDS! They have several friends over a week to play & most have said they are happy to have mine over this August when my surgery is. I am one to never ask for help but I think with this we should. You can always repay with playdates at a later time!!! I hope your pain decreases! Lynne

[fitiani33]

thanks for the replies

Lucky for me i have a ton of help. My grandmother, aunt and mother fight over my son anyway so watching him is gonna be no problem, it was my recovery i was worried about. My husband goes to work at 10 am so thats when my mother would come over she would leave when he comes home at 6pm. I would be good for the 1st 2weeks. But then after that she would only be there for me 1/2 day and drop my son of at my grandmas and the 2nd half of the day i'd be by myself. I don't know if i could be alone 2 weeks after surgery from 1 to 6pm. It would only be for a week and then she would have another week off and then back to the half day thing. I am just getting a little scared. But i guess i need a good month anyway. Thank God i have a few months to go anyway!

Stephanie

[lelc2002@yahoo]

stephanie,
sounds like you'll be in good hands! I think if you have your son taken care of, you will be able to relax & rest. Does your husband work far from home? Maybe he could check on you at lunch time? or neighbor? Your way younger than I so I thk you'll do great! Maybe it's the mother in me, but my major concern has been making sure I have the boys taken care of & needs met. I'll probably be in bed a lot in beginning & as long as I can make it to the bathroom by myself, I got it made!!! Ly

[sweetness514]

I think if you're alone half a day, and you already ate or have things prepared so that you can make yourself a snack in case you're hungry, there won't be any problems. A good grabber is suggested, it's such help and I wish I had known about it for my first surgery, like I did now for revision, but I had people with me almost full time, although it's so much better when you're less dependant

I see a lot of post about recovery, and both my orthos who performed my surgeries said that the first three months are crucial, and it's best to relax, walk and do little things, bit by bit without bending or twisting. My surgeon even recommended no driving in that period, and I know opinions differ on the subject but he just thinks it's being extra careful for the fusion in those important first months. But every case is different, and your surgery will be probably less hard b/c the incision and fusion won't be as long and no need to take bone from the hip.