I hate scoliosis-help me, I'm confused : (

[rincotato]

Hi I have scoliosis and I hate it! I get sick of trying to cover it up and always worrying about what I can and can't wear, in case people notice, and even if people don't notice i feel like they do. It doesn't even matter to me sometimes whether other ppl notice or not, but it's the fact that I notice it every single time i look in the mirror. I hate everything about it, it makes me feel so unattractive and grossed out! So I just think that that's what other ppl must think too. I get jealous of everyone just for having a normal back and straight spine and even waistline and flat back! I feel so stupid though, because what a thing to be jealous of! But i can't help the way that i feel. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't think my scoliosis is bad enough to need surgery, but I don't know how much longer I can live with it, but I don't know whether it's sensible to consider having surgery because what if something went wrong, or it didn't improve my appearance, would it be worth it? Sorry to go on like this, but I really needed to talk to someone who could understand where I'm coming from. Please someone write back. I need help -x-

[LilSkittlehunni]

hi! i replied to your other thread, and i just want to say that you ARE NOT ugly! scoliosis does tend to make you feel that ways sumtimes (trust me, i know!) and you just wish that it would disapear and you could have a perfectly straight back and get back to being normal. well, scoliosis is definitely not about being normal! but remember, everything happens for a reason, and you will find out why scoliosis has become apart of you!
luv your scoliosis!
§BrIaNn§

[PenguinJanitor]

Hey, I used to feel the same way! I hated covering up my brace and I felt stupid and ugly. But over time I relized that I have nothing to be jelous of. No matter if you wear a brace or what you look like, that doesn't change who you are! You just have to learn to not care so much about what others think. If you just be yourself, you'll be surprised! People won't take your scoli as something terrible...becuase they'll see this strong girl who manages to deal with it instead. You are going to be so much stronger when this is all behind you, so just live in the day. Other peoples opinions don't really matter in the long run.

[cloggerx3]

I'm beginning to feel the same way

Hi,

I have to get a brace @ the end of October. I am now starting to realize that it will limit me on what i can/cannot wear. So, i know how you feel too .

[dufineta]

Don't worry about your scoliosis. I am a girl who's 17 and I wore a brace for a year and I went to school with it. nobody realised about that and if someone did they were very comprenhensive. You don't have to think that you are ugly because you're not, and just think about people who have cancer of those sort of illneses... I think that scoliosis is nothing compared with that and I know that you will be able to learn to live with your scoliosis, just think of scoliosis as a partner and in a few time you will not think as you do now.
Bye!
Excuse me for my English but I am from Spain and I never speak it

[Amaka]

Hi Rincotato,

I understand what you are feeling. i have felt like that since I was 13. I am now 27. Believe me you learn to accept it. Also most people do not notice it except if you point it out. I learnt to adjust my shoulders and practiced ways of standing in the mirror.

Wear what it is you feel comfy in do not worry about what you look like. It is not the outside but the inside that counts. Also see a specialist and they will advise you on the best way to go with it.

as for the guys on this website they are great and will give the support that you need to get through this.

Stay blessed.

A

[ScolioGirl]

Dufineta, your English was excellent, I didn't even think that english was your second language until you said so!

how are things going for you lately, rincoto? Remember that you're your toughest critic

[dufineta]

Hey Scoliogirl!
English is not our second language, in fact it is my third language because I am from a region of Spain called Catalonia (Barcelona) and I usually speak Catalan, I know Spanish and I am still learning English but I have to improve a lot! I was really happy to find that forum because I don't know many people with scoliosis and it helps me to not feel different.
Bye!

[mylgreen]

Old lady here (taking a deep breath)...

Okay, I'm 33 years old and was diagnosed when I was about 11. I wore a Milwaukee brace for 3 years, then had Harrington Rod surgery when I was 16 and 18 years old. I haven't been able to post to this site for a few months due to home/car repair issues, but I have really missed it. If I have missed anything pertaining to this particular issue, I apologize. However, I feel strongly about replying here.

Obviously, I hate scoliosis with a passion, and I have dealt with every conceivable feeling as far as body image, bracing, and surgery go. There is nothing I can say that will make this situation easier for Rincotato or anyone else who has posted here. However, I have been given much through support, so I know it is valuable and necessary.

You are all beautiful, despite how you feel and what you see in the mirror. I know how that sounds, but it's true. Every man, woman, and child, is perfection, despite what the mirror, doctors, or measurements say. I just have to post that.

I just finished reading a bunch of posts about bracing and whether it's worthy or not, in part because of the individual and national costs.

I wore a brace for three years, which my parents paid a load of money for. And it didn't work. However, it was worth every single cent because the subsequent two surgeries were absolutely hell to endure. Attempting to stop my curvature was necessary.

My brace was expensive...but necessary. My surgeries were expensive, but absolutely necessary. And my follow-up care is expensive, but totally necessary.

Please, please, please don't measure the care of these scoliosis patients in dollars and cents. I realize that I live in the US, where medical may be different from where you are. But know that I am a mother. I am keeping in mind how much my parents sacrificed, how much I may sacrifice for my children, and how much others sacrifice so much more on a daily basis for their precious children.

None of you are alone. Scoliosis is real...it is expensive...it is something we all care about. You are not alone.

[staceyb]

Hi, I totally understand where you are coming from with respect to looking in the mirror and not liking what you see and feeling self conscious. I did for many years and had to deal both with the physical and the psychological issues surrounding it. It was hard when I was a teenager since we are so hard on ourselves at that age trying to 'fit in'. DON'T try to fit in. Be yourself. It took me a long time to realize that one!

I had my surgery when I was 11. My curve was so advanced that a brace would not be effective. It was a long time ago, so I missed my grade 7 year, you know that year when all the 'cliques' are formed and stuff! I had to be on a Stryker Frame for 6 weeks, then a brace for 9 months, so it was not easy. I missed an entire year of school (fortunately, I had a tutor, so I got my year anyways). But, returning to school and my friends was not easy. I was self conscious of my condition. I could not do the sports and things that I wanted to, so I felt left out and different and I could not wear certain clothes since it showed things too much.

But, that is all behind me now. It took a lot of years (26 to be exact!), but I have finally realized that I am a super person who can do amazing things despite this thing called Scoliosis. I have a wonderful job, a wonderful relationship and I am a competitive age group athlete in sports. Sometimes, it is hard to not let on like I have a problem that causes daily pain, but I will not let it stop me in the least. This is something that you have. It is the hand you were dealt and the best thing any of us can do, is play that hand the best way we can. I refuse to feel sorry or self conscious any more. I know that I am smart, I am beautiful, I am athletic and that people look up to me for what I have done, and not for what I have wrong with me.

So, in short, be the best you can be. You are wonderful and don't ever let other people tell you that you are not. Yes, there will be times when the condition is incredibly frustrating, but don't ever let it beat you! Keep your chin up and go out there and take on that world! It's there waiting for you!

[Chayil]

Hi everyone i am new here, so if i make mistakes please over look (lol). I was diagnosed with scoliosis at age eight i am now 24, my curves are 70 and 50 degrees and i am seriously thinking about surgery now, i think mainly because i cant stand how i look, i need to do something to change that. i will not be able to have the surgery done in my counrty and i will have to travel overseas, can anyone give me an idea of the cost for surgery in their country, it would really help. thanks

[scoligirl2025]

you're definately not ugly! what i try to do when i feel bad about bracing and all that is to think of all the good things. ex:

1. you learn a lot more about spinal/medical-type conditions than you would otherwise
2. the brace is keeping you from surgery
3. think of all the awesome tricks you can play on people when you have a brace!!! (if you're a mischievous type of person...like me )

dufineta~ you're english was definately really really good. as in like i didn't even know it was your 3rd language until you said so. how long have you been studying English?

[Erika1988]

Hi, I'm Erika and I speaking from the point of view of someone who just had a second surgery, DO NOT HAVE SURGERY UNLESS YOU ABSOLUTLY HAVE TO. It will not change the way you look, and the things that could go wrong are not worth looks, if you absolutly have to them obviously you have no choice but if there is anyway around it don't do it.

[Karen Ocker]

It changed the way I looked immensel y. My shoulders and hips were even--though everything else was swollen.

What happened to YOU???

If you just had surgery it's too soon to tell.

[Jadey]

I tend to worry about that too. I try to wear swimming costumes to the minimum and if I wear tight clothes then they have to be black or patterned.

I don't give three monkeys is people notice my scoliosis now, if they do then fair enough, I'll get the disabled seat at the front of the bus every time I visit my boyfriend lol.