two weeks to go

[Debra JGL]

Two weeks to go. I'm finding thoughts of surgery seem to be with me more and more, I go to sleep thinking about it and wake up thinking about it. I've even dreamed about it. I think I'm doing allright though all things considered. My son, who is 13, and who has been very supportive of the surgery said to me the other night that he doesn't want me to have the surgery because he doesn't want anything to happen to me. I was sad for the stress this is probably bringing both of my kids, but I was glad he was able to tell me and we were able to talk about it. I had pre-op tests done last week and at one point I needed to go to the operating floor at the hospital. Luckily it was calm and orderly, but I felt a little like everything went into slow motion and felt a little upset. I have to say I've been teary everyday since. I think really from just a mixture of emotions, anxiety, excitement, hope, fear. But, I still feel good about my decision and I'm ready. I feel like I've moved up to the top of the ladder of wild amusement ride, and there's only one way I'm getting down - I'm not going back now. During my appointment though Dr. B mentioned my getting a thoracoplasty with my surgery. He hadn't mentioned it during my 2 other visits with him so i was surprised. My upper back does stick out a bit, but mostly I'm satisfied with my appearance, I just would like it to not get worse. I believe the thoracoplasty adds to pain in recovery and reduces lung function for up to a year, and I'm not aware of a medical necessity for doing it (does anyone else?). I know he may take bone from my ribs if needed for fusion and so then maybe it would make sense. I welcome any thoughts too on the thoracoplasty issue. Thanks all.

[lray]

Debra,
I can truly understand the feelings you are going through. The anxiety is overwhelming at times. I know that you will get a lot of supportive feedback here on the forum from those who have been through it. I can see myself going through the same...it's already starting for me and I'm 6 weeks out.

I have heard that Dr. B performs thoracoplasties even though some here have said that he doesn't believe in them. That is untrue. Yes, the procedure will cause "extra pain", but for me and others as well, it seems worth the end result, which is a greatly reduced rib hump. Also, he will use the bone material for your fusion so he will not have to go elsewhere, like your hip bone. (I have read that the pain in the hip area is very unpleasant too.)
Dr. B is one of the best so you are in good hands!

[LisaB]

Hi Debra - With my Aug 31 date coming up very quickly I feel like I'm going through all of the same things you are except I have 2 grown children (26 and 29) and they think I'm doing the right thing. It's good that you can talk to your kids about their fears and make them feel better. I, too, have this surgery on my mind constantly. At this point, I just want to get it over with. I'm trying to stay positive and focus on how much better I will be. I don't think Dr Bridwell does much thocoplasty any more. I thought I would ask him about it at my visit with him the day before surgery, in case he can't reduce my rib hump much with the surgery. Good luck with your surgery and let's stay in touch!

[JenniferG]

Hopefully the two weeks will fly by, with lots of last minute things to think about to take your mind off surgery. Lots of walking will help too, especially with nerves and sleeping. This time is hard, but when you think about it, in three weeks, it will be over and you'll likely be home or about to go home. Then all you need think about is resting and healing.

There's no easy way to get through this time...but you will!

[Confusedmom]

thoracoplasty

I talked to a couple of surgeons about thoracoplasties. They said that they used to be done routinely, but then a study came out that said they increased the pain/recovery time post surgery, and many surgeons stopped doing them because they are mainly cosmetic. That said, my local surgeon offered to do one if I want it b/c of my rib hump. I think it's really a personal decision based on how important the cosmetic result is to you. My surgeon said the lung capacity issue really isn't a big deal because it's mostly not permanent and whatever is permanent is not a significant amount.

Oh, also, he still was going to have to take hip bone, in addition to the rib bone, so it doesn't necessarily get you out of that procedure.

Evelyn

[lray]

Oh, also, he still was going to have to take hip bone, in addition to the rib bone, so it doesn't necessarily get you out of that procedure.

Evelyn

Wow, Evelyn, I have never heard of this before. What is his reasoning? I refuse to have my surgeon do a separate "harvest" from my hip bone. The ribs should be enough! I will talk to him to make sure.

[mbeckoff]

Debra

I was feeling the same way you are just before my May 4th date but then a few days before a sense of calm and peace came over me.It was like I was doing the right thing. Spend the next weeks making sure that everything is in place and then the days right before the surgery do something with your kids and for yourself. Have fun!!

Melissa

[osumike]

Dr. Bridwell said he wont do a thoracoplasty on me. It sounded like he really doesnt do that much at all. I asked for one, I want one, because of the damn rib hump on my right side.

Too bad they havent figured out a way to just build a new spine and ribs for us. Maybe 20 years from now.

[jrnyc]

i think 50 years from now...they will either be able to build a new spine or have some kind of zappo surgery that fixes the curves presto chango....
too bad they cant do that stuff now...

jess

[Debra JGL]

Thanks everyone for the encouragement. I think getting the thoracaplasty definately comes down to how much the rib hump bothers you (and of course if the doc thinks it's reasonable for you to do it) - and the docs already in there so it's a good time to do it. About the bone harvesting, Dr. B told me he could use the rib bone (if need be) and not use the hip THIS TIME, but if I needed any revisions then he would need to use the hip area. Lisa B, I wish you good luck too as you get ready for the big day aug. 31.

[barleygirl]

Debra, my surgery is in nine days, on Aug. 30, and I can relate to your wide variety of emotions. My husband and I had a consult with my surgeon this past week. My first words to my doctor were, "I'm ready!" He patiently answered many questions, and his calm manner, his competence, his reassuring tone did much to increase my desire for surgery. This is notwithstanding his reminding us of the risks and complications associated with my fusion.

A few minutes later my husband told me, "I've had a dark cloud hanging over me concerning your surgery, but after seeing Dr. K. today, I feel so much better!" And this coming from a man who has been urging me for 25 years to have scoliosis surgery!

Best wishes to all those having surgery in the next few weeks! There are a batch of us!!

Best,
Brenda

[Confusedmom]

That's wonderful, Brenda. I hope I can be calm and ready when my day eventually comes! I'll be sending good thoughts to all you late Aug/Sept folks!

Wow, Evelyn, I have never heard of this before. What is his reasoning? I refuse to have my surgeon do a separate "harvest" from my hip bone. The ribs should be enough! I will talk to him to make sure.

Also, Laurie, now that I'm thinking more about it, he said he would have to remove a rib and take hip bone (yes, both) for the primary surgery, but that was not including a thoracoplasty. Maybe you don't get as much rib bone if you're just removing one for regular scoli surgery, not a thoracoplasty. He wanted to remove a rib I think because it is resting on my hip (not sure though) and he also needs the bone. His quote was something like "I'll take bone wherever I can get it" to increase the likelihood of fusion. I've got a stiff lumbar curve, so that's the problem. I gather this isn't the norm.

Evelyn

[LisaB]

Good luck Brenda and Debra - I'll be thinking of both of you. I feel like I'm not as nervous now and just want to get it over with. But that could change on the way to St Louis Sunday; I imagine the nerves will start up again. I'm just trying to get some loose ends tied up so I can be gone for 2 weeks. I actually had my annual physical today with my internist(it's been scheduled for about a year). He said I was going into this very healthy and said that actually he has had 2 patients go to Dr B - 1 first time and 1 revision from a surgery here- and he said they got excellent results and said that I would be in good hands. That made me feel good. Debra, since you have kids at home I'm sure that will be the most difficult part of your hospital stay. But i'm sure they will be wanting to do everything they can for you once you get home! Brenda. is your surgery in Arizona or are you going somewhere else? I'll be sending good thoughts to both of you from St Louis on Monday. Debra, you get the good thoughts early as I will probably still be out of it when you have your surgery Wednesday. We can do this, girls, and we'll be soooo much better for having gone through this!! Positive thoughts and hugs!!

[titaniumed]

Wow, there are a bunch of you going in soon....

Yes, it can be difficult to keep off your mind, and many thoughts go through your heads, but one things for sure, we waited so long for this, and while the days pass by so quickly now, being scared to death has no benefit at all, and we realize that there is no turning back at all. Many actually feel a calm, like a calm before a storm. Like a fish who gives up while being reeled in....

I was actually very calm my last few days...I waited many years.

My surgeon said it was going to hurt, he was right, it did. I knew I was going to have to be tough, I was entering a tough chapter of my life, but deep down I always knew that it was going to work out. Always remember that there is light at the end of the tunnel, and after you are through, it will shine very brightly, you will shine brightly.

Accept change. Be adaptable and be positive. In the beginning, it feels so strange with your new straightened spines, you wonder how you will adapt to new situations, and you learn so much. I didn’t think I could ever put on a pair of shoes again, now its no big deal at all... Things are only though when you don’t know, afterword's it’s a walk in the park... (or hike in the woods for that matter!)

All the best
Ed

[debbei]

Debra,

Your fears and emotions are perfectly normal and I think we all go through them. So are the fears of your kids. This time is the worst--even worse than immediately post-op. Good luck to you and you will be in my thoughts. I'm looking forward to hearing your update.